untilwhenever/whoever/whatever.

Untilwhenever.

2010-03-28T19:03:00.003+08:00

I kinda have this subconscious feeling that if I dont update untilwhenever my life will forever be stagnant on January 9th 2010. Therefore the update. Weird? Well then you won't even want to know what's really going in my mind,consciously.

The break after MBTs has been slobbingly refreshing. (is that a word? slobbingly? don't think so.) I take doing nothing but watching movies and tv shows and eating in a repeated order very seriously,mind you. I have watched more than 10 movies the past 5 days. It's come to a point that I am downloading all movies that have dvd rips on a whim. Yeap,I went to download Ninja Assassin yesterday. Yessir - NINJA ASSASSIN. It's like I am hopelessly clinging onto this short break and trying to fit in all the entertainment I can squeeze in as possible.

It's rather pathetic,actually. My life.

But it's going to be okay at the end,I guess?

Moths in the pit of my stomach.

2010-01-09T03:42:00.001+08:00

Just scrutinised the Term 1 timetable and had this rude shock of how the upcoming year is going to be like. It does not look like any fun. I am now, incredibly anxious (in a very bad way) and feel like throwing up. Oh man.

I am going to jump into the abyss.

2010-01-01T18:15:00.003+08:00

Everytime I try to reflect on 2009 and try to write it out in an entry,I find myself trying to be poignant. I dont know why. So screw reflection. I want to look forward.

This year,I am going to get it right. I know that the road ahead is probably going to be unclear,unsettling and unfamiliar. But you know what - despite knowing this,I am strangely calm. Comforted,even.

I reckon 2010 is going to be like diving into a crowd with your eyes closed. You know that for the split moment you're free-falling (Cue John Mayer's cover of Free Fallin) - it's going to feel like your insides are twisting in the worse ways. And when you hit the crowd it is going to hurt from the poking of fingers and knuckles and that overall change in pressure. It is going to be painful and fucking uncomfortable.But somehow you'll be having the time of your life anyways. Because you will be crowd surfing damnit. Freaking,crowd surfing!

I say yes to crowd surfing. Fuckyes! crowd surfing.

the year in fandom.

2009-12-30T00:10:00.011+08:00

To the Fan-gods/Fan -Volturi/Fan - Dumbledore (Whatever floats your boat),

2009 has been a somewhat dissapointing year for kpop. I think this has to do with many sad events such as the lack of Big Bang,the Wondergirls being shipped to the US (and the massacre of 'Nobody' through it being too popular - for too long),GD's heartbreaker album, the tragic lost of Jay from 2pm and of course the fan drama that followed all year round. The thing is,within the year I have seen your light! (For that I thank you.) I could look past these disappointments rather easily because I cared less. Caring less really opened my eyes to another level of fandom. A level where I could like the people and music that I liked and hate the people and music that I hated without getting affected by fan drama and all the scary fan wars. May all the newb fangirls see the same light that I did. Not to belittle anyone but,there's so much we can do. We're fans. (not lawyers or extremists or flash mobists or part of the mob or even terrorists,for that matter.)

But enough of my evolution in the fangirl hierarchy. I want to tell you that I have found real gems amidst the dark clouds this year. Gems like Dong Young Bae - who shines brighter than ever. Park Gahee,from After School is another one of kpop's secret weapons that have been unleashed this year. She is amazing,beyond words! The group B2ST (minus hyunseng) and singers like Lyn and Kim Tae Woo all made the year brighter. This year,I learnt that the best stars shine quietly in the corner. They dont need big blonde hair or crazy pyrocrastic stage lights or scandals or gimmicks. Naturally,they shine on their own. Without any artificial help.For opening my eyes to these gems,I thank you.

When fandom was at its worst and the kpop world was too unbearable to look or listen too,I could always lean on the muscial geniuses of hiphop that provided musical nutrition to my itunes.Epik,Dynamic Duo,Leessang,Tiger JK,Dok2 and the rest of The Movement were the much needed comfort crew this year. Yes,at times they were violent and vulgar - but they were (for lack of a better word) 'dopezxzx' nontheless. For leading me to this comforting road when kpop was a trainwreck - I give my thanks.

Also,I want to tell you that I miss my fangirl buddies. This year was tough on everyone and I miss the spazz sessions and crazy outings we had the year before. I pray that we'll see much more of each other next year. BBSG,I miss us! (Special shouts to Syifa,my gag buddy! - WE NEED TO MEETUP,PRONTO!)

I predict that next year will be tough for all of us. (For me especially) May Bigbang come back and fill this empty void in my soul.May kpop continue to be a friend and not a foe. And if it does become a foe,may we part beautifully.

Yours,
Su.

When I feel like blogspot.

2009-12-22T03:05:00.003+08:00

Despite having lots of fun reblogging and looking at pretty,thought provoking but always poignant (at least most of them try to be) pictures,I am back here. I did say I would drop by when I feel like I had to blogspot.If its any credit,the posting page didnt ever feel this good.

If updating about the mundance of life ever counted - ze parents are back,everything is back to normal and I am officially not going on a holiday till next year.

Not to sound like a brat but I really wanted to go on a holiday.I know that I should be considerate to ze parents since they're probably not up for sinful shopping trips right after they have been so close to Him and I am.I feel way guilty for feeling this enormous need to run through the streets of bangkok and throw thai bahts in the air! I will feel less guilty though. I will see the light in staying in Singapore. I will see the light.

Also,I finished 'You're Beautiful' recently. Okay,I kinda cheated with a few episodes.But I get it,I get the hype. I particularly liked how they tortured Shin Woo with every second-lead-tormenting-methods from the kdrama rule book.I love you,Jang Geun Suk. (always have.way before you did.) I wished I had more patience with dramas though. I used to be so loyal with episodes.

I think I am going to catch Holmes on the first day. I have recently been enlightened to the geniusly gorgeous man that is Robert Downey Jr. In addition to that is the amazing -Dr Watson. oh hello,adulteror aka man who slept with nanny but is beautiful anyways. aka Jude Law.

I know I am jumping topics but I am basically rambling everything that's on top of my head.So dont mind the mess. (Because my head IS essentially - a mess.) After the post-pw lectures I HAVE NOT REVISED SHIT. I am now starting to slowly panic. Like realizing poison is in my blood only after it enters the chambers of my lungs. Today I told my mom I had school tomorrow (House) and I am kinda busy with so many events coming up. She replied "Yeap,you should be.Alevels and all" Then I had this strange jolt upon realizing that I hadnt even THOUGHT of Alevels as being THAT near.

If I think of 2010 and my mind browses through the months : Jan,Feb,March,April,Ju-une,Ju-ah-ly,Auuuug-sst *STOPS AND BLINKS EYES SHUT IN HORROR"
oh shit,I am scared.

where the light is.

2009-12-08T21:54:00.002+08:00

I will not abandon untilwhenever.I will not.

Aside from being sickly and whiny this past few days,I have done nothing but watch tv and movies and ugly betty.I guess you could say watching tv and movies and ugly betty has some kind of medicinal value,because I feel better.

kpop world has been very boring lately. There is nothing interesting to watch or listen to.I need Bigbang to come out with something real soon. I miss spazzing and looking up lyrics in korean trying to perfect the pronounciation.

12 days till mama comes back! yaaaaaay!

I AM TUMBLING.

2009-11-28T01:11:00.003+08:00

I know,I know.WHY DO I ALWAYS JUMP INTO THE TREND BANDWAGON? Whatever happened to non-comformity and suppresion of individualism?

but it's no big deal really.I realise that most of the time im on blogger it pains me to come up with lengthy things to talk about and when I post pictures they are a hassle coz they need to follow the template and size and everything which makes things ugly.So I am keeping this blog too - for when I feel like I need to blogspot.

TUMBLR

oh btw,I am not surviving well without mama.

today i sent my parents off but I dont wanna talk about it because it's kinda sad and I am so very much afraid of a month without them ):

2009-11-23T19:44:00.004+08:00

When I grow up,I want to be a Yoon Mi Rae and I want to have my very own king of hiphop,swagger-fied,lyrical genius with sexy hair aka Tiger JK.

People rocking my tv life.

2009-11-21T20:41:00.008+08:00

Damon Salvatore in Vampire Diaries.

Evil,witty and devious.Damon is my favourite Salvatore brother.He is the epitome of wicked funny.The thing about Damon is that we see something new about him,a new level of his genius self in every episode.He is unpredictable to a tee. Just when you stereotype him to be this evil,inhumane bloodsucking monster he shows this tinge of emotion,a shade of human desperation and you go "OHMYFREAKING GOD,DAMON!" It is for these moments that I stalk torrent sites every Friday for the latest episodes of Vampire Diaries. AND his sense of sardonic humour makes everything he says ultimate win!

Lexie Grey in Grey's Anatomy.

I used to hate the other Grey in the earlier seasons.I used to think that she tried to hard and should just chillax but I really like her in season 6.Mostly because she is adorable and her air time with Mark the manslut Sloan is really cute. I love Mark-Lexie.Maybe because Meredith/Ellen Pompeo is pregnant and not getting a lot of air time,Lexie's the shining Grey now.

Lexie:I wore a diaper yesterday, yes - and I will wear one today. If it helps Dr. Shepherd get through the surgery, I will wear a diaper. My diaper is awesome. My diaper is hard-core. You wish you had the balls to wear my diaper. I'm gonna wear it, and I'm gonna wear it with pride. And if I have to pee in it? Oh, I'll pee. Because I am a surgeon. This is America. And I will do what needs to be done. So you can kiss my hard-core, diaper wearing ass.

DIAPER WEARING SURGEONS- CANNOT GET ANY BETTER THAN THIS.Cristina Yang is still my favourite GA character though.She's kickass and has genius little hands.

Marc St James from Ugly Betty.

WHY THE HELL WONT YOU LOVE MARC? He's the best thing on ugly betty imo. They should get him a boyf soon.(Keith-Marc in season 2-3 was awesome!) Marc the gay bitch is rad but Marc's occasional nice moments are way better.Like when he prep talks Justin with the 'if they give you shit just remember you are way smarter and funnier than them'-kinda thing.SQUEALS.like totally.

Clarity

2009-11-20T22:54:00.006+08:00

When I first started this entry the tittle was 'Let it rain' and I was in the middle of a cryptic rant about how f-ed up the world is.However,I have had a sudden burst of optimism and thus the tittle of this entry has been changed to 'Clarity' and I will now talk about the happy things in life. (The things John Mayer can do. I mean,the happy John Mayer during Heavier Things before Jessica Simpson screwed with his genius.)

I guess the easiest and the escapist way is to list the events thagt have been happenning and since I am both lazy and prefer my made-up fantasies to reality anyday;here is a big fat list.

LTC WAS COOOLZ. I say that with the 'Z'! I loved that the camp treated us like adults and didnt make us do camp drills that were unecessary and stupid. (Hello YT.) I love my group 6 cents/sense and all the amaazing people I've made friends with. I loved that I could see myself as Josh Harnett in Pearl Habour when we played with laser guns.Of course,I died in battle but so did Ken Watanabe in Letters to Iwojima.SO WE COOLZ. Asyraf killed me a lot of times. Screw you,biatch. (ASH K FTW)
Ruohan's birthday was on wednesday and we celebrated it at Eighteen Chefs with the huamin quintet. (I have decided to name ourselves this) Wu Ruohan,you know i love you and probably have to suffer being your friend for the rest of my life but you know what? I think I will enjoy being your friend -- even if this means you call me at 12 am saying "HELLO! HELLO! I AM AT YOUR GATE NOW. OPEN! I WANT TO RAID YOUR FRIDGE!"
I went back to YT for a tiny while for Drama camp. Its unbelivable how old I felt. It was good to see the club still doing so great.That shit people say about leaving behind something and seeing it grow into something beautiful is true. I feel freaking proud of my juniors and holy crap, all the sec1s are so tiny.OLD.OLD.OLD.
Dreams have been good to me these nights.Except the one I had 2 days ago where two huge psychopaths were chasing after me in those malaysian neighbourhoods with giant houses and I decided to hide in a chinese girl's cupboard. I KNOW RIGHT. I woke up sweating and my hands were burning. WHY DO ALL MY NIGHTMARES INVOLVE MALAYSIA?! Anyways,GOOD DREAMS. The first night of camp I dreamt of Captain Jack Sparrow -- he was talking to me about some chocolate he was endorsing. Then a group of reporters swarmed him and I took a step back. I DID NOT JUMP ON HIM. I was composed and calm. (now that I think about it,WHY DID I NOT JUMP ON HIM?)Johnny Depp dreams are like gems in a haystack.Rare and oh so worth it.
We've started on Richard III for Literature.I am freaking thrilled! SHAKESPEARE,YOU SPEAK THE VOLUMES OF MY SOUL.but more than that,I love all this olden england conspiracies. Killing your family members to get what you want - check. So evil that even his body is disfigured - check. ERIC BANA AS YOUR TEACHER'S SCHOOLMATE - CHECK!
Been catching up on Grey's Anatomy and Ugly Betty and constantly watching Vampire Diaries but I will update seperately on this. I LOVE TV SO MUCH THAT IT HURTS.

Throughout this entire post I have downloaded and been listening to John Mayer's new album, Battle Studies. and holy crap it is genius.

I LOVE YOU,JOHN!

when you speak,i hear his voice

2009-11-13T18:48:00.003+08:00

Officially now,PW is over.We handed in the freshly paginated black file that contained all the demons of PW and even took a picture with it (Ms Wong's Idea) I had hoped when we handed it in it will be like getting an exorcism, with all the demons and ghouls freed from sitting on my shoulders, but it was strangely empty. It was like 'hmm..when is this exorcism going to start?' BUT THE POINT IS - it is over and we have come out of this hell with limbs attached (Although,our brains might be scarred from research for the rest of our lives)

IKEA today was a whole lotta fun. 'If I had a child,I would totally make him an IKEA kid.' this was the thought on everybody's mind as we glided across the children section of IKEA.Everything in IKEA is so pretty and I envision my future house to be like one of the showhouses. DO THEY HAVE IKEA IN KOREA? PAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Today,is also my mom's birthday.So I bought her a plant and oven miffs with an apron.I know,I wished I could get her something less domestic but I wanted to get her things she could actually use.It didnt matter anyways,because she will love any present I give. (CONSIDERING,my dad didnt get her anything.) Its times like these I wished I was better to my mother.She doesnt deserve the nonsense I give her ): Happy Birthday Ma.

Tomorrow is LTC. I am totally not in the mood for camp but I will psych myself up somehow. Urgh,packing. I used to love packing for trips or camps but not anymore. Camp equipment/things I need are sprawled all over the house and I will have to look for them like a freaking mouse scurrying for cheese. I hate this, because I will have to go up and down the stairs a lot.(This is one of the major vices of my house.Another vice would be that my dad says that behind the estate is the seletar resevoir so if it floods,we will die first) Anyways, I have no idea what they are making us do for LTC. I hope they dont make us do stupid things like 'fire drill!' in the middle of the night and make us sleep with our shoes on. Because that will not be fun.

OHOHOHOH.I am currently listening to youngbae's Wedding Dress and officially conclude that everything youngbae sings or touches turns into gold and I will bow down to his feet in pure admiration. I love you,youngbae.

today, i mourn my momo bear wallet.

2009-11-11T22:43:00.003+08:00

You know,I believe there is no coincidence,just fate - God giving fate. Like today, I was freely walking around thinking I would buy myself anything I felt like--without any care in the world and without thinking what buying things would do to my bank account.I walked around with a spring in my step,knowing that if I would buy myself an SD card if I saw one or a really pretty but useless thing just because I had my atm card in my wallet. Yeap, then I lost my wallet. JUST.LIKE.THAT. of course,panic ensued. Normally,one of the general office attendants would call and say "Hello,is this Suhaidah? Did you realise you lost your wallet?" But no. Not this time. Because I lost it amidst the evening crowd in Tampines (just one of Tampines' few vices) and whoever picked it up -- is 20 dollars richer,and now has 10% off Pastamania,Popular and Dorothy Perkins.

Bye bye my hideous momo bear wallet.

Thank god though,my parents are way cool about this.I guess my sad looking pityful face when i came back home helped. Double thanks that I didnt lose my iphone though.The last time that happened, i freaking mourned like when George O Malley died in Grey's Anatomy. (AND BELIEVE ME- THAT WAS A WHOLE LOTTA MOURNING.)

So anyways,enough of mourning. We accept and move on. I love that I always mourn when inanimate objects are lost or die but never seem to mourn properly when animate objects do. Is this too weird?

The past few days have been filled with : Dancing or what I try to do when i move my limbs and body. Ranice did the choreo so well but then I do it and everything just turns into comic relief,I swear. BUT IT IS OKAY. Because I am cool even if I am comic relief and its for Atlas! SO I WILL DO IT (with as much determination as Callie Torres had when she had her bitchfest in front of the Chief) More than being comic relief, dancing is kinda fun. I kinda like it.
(BUT THIS DOESNT MAKE ME TRYING TO DANCE LESS FUNNIER ): )

Also,the past PW-FREE days have been filled with Ugly Betty,Vampire Diaries,Grey's Anatomy (hence the references) and James Morrison's soulful voice. ( SO FREAKING BEAUTIFUL !) I swear, everything's way better these days. It's like the writers of american tv got a brain makeover. Ugly Betty is way better with Matt Hartley,Vampire Diaries is just effing WIN and Grey's Anatomy is just pure emotional crack(the best kind!) I've even been watching a lot of CSI on tv too. There are a lot of gems on tv right now. I love G's to Gents.fofucking'sho.

On the fangirl front, I am recently loving FT Triple,Lee Jaejin,BEAST (MINUS THE BIG BANG REJECT COZ I REALLY CANNOT LIKE HIM NO MATTER HOW HARD I TRY), Joon Hyung from Beast,Doojoon and Lyn. I love Lyn's new mini album. Its win,really. Havent heard or watched any of 2pm's new stuff but I have no motivation to. Meh,I'll look when I feel like it.

Yay! This is the first time in a few days that I have been able to write an entire blog post.
I AM NOT BORING ANYMORE. HALLELUJAH.

She dont care.

2009-11-07T00:15:00.004+08:00

This has been on repeat since i finished my last entry about an hour ago. Yeap,on freaking loop.
Dumbfoundead is fawesome. (NOT KIDDING.) i love this laid-back aura that he has its so chill and lazy in the very best way. Like x 203903902. (WATCH!)

Things that make me weak in the knees.

2009-11-06T23:15:00.003+08:00

Daiso.
Doraemon nonsense in pasar malams.
Tesco pens sold in economy pack that cost 8cents per pen (after conversion.HAHA)
아이피.
Perks of enlightenment randomly when in school.
When listening to Epik High's Excuses,the last part where Mithra goes ' You dont wanna know,the sinner,the killer. You dont wanna know....' and then Tablo goes ' You dont wanna know because its...YOU' and then this sinister laugh comes on. (haunts me everytime)
In Dynamic Duo's song 'Make up sex' - the entire song makes me weak to my knees because its so vulnerable and fragile. (SO FCKN BEAUTIFUL)
In 'Orchestras.Spotlights.Turntables' when MYK says 'Your time bomb is ticking and your heart is heavy. Close your eyes and open your minds -let the butterflies in the pit of your stomach subside', in this extremely haunting manner.
Buy 1 get one free face packs at sasa.
Spending what i think was a whole lot of money in malaysia -- AND THEN DIVIDING THE SUM BY TWO!
Being in the presence of perfection.

OP IS OVER. which technically means PW is over. (Aside from I&R - nobody cares) Im glad its over,and I for one think our group did incredibly well.Right now,I am downloading episode 8 of Vampire Diaries. Also,i am in dire need of a haircut.

blood sucking things (NOT THE SEXY ONES)

2009-11-05T20:38:00.002+08:00

Today while I was waiting for my little brother at the bus stop, I was bitten alive by mosquitoes.Fortunately,my reflexes decided to miraculously work in time of emergency,thus I was able to kill 5 of them.I am a vicious mosquito bounty hunter.( HAHAHA) And then it rained suddenly and my little brother(who was supposed to take the bus from school) realized that he forgot to bring his ez-link and had already spent all his money on a slurpee.So in light of the situation,he decided to walk in the rain all the way from school (which is 3 bus stops away - THIS IS FAR) in the rain,slurpee in hand -- feeling all independent.When i finally spotted him,5 buses had already past and I had 20 mosquito bites on my legs.Then we walked in the rain,slurpee now in my hand --feeling all independent.

But now,my nose is runny,my eyes hurt and the moz bites itch like fuck.
Unfortunately, OP is tomorrow.

off to swallow some legal drugs.

PS. I LOVE YOU,MARC ST JAMES.

my map the soul artist intro page.

2009-11-02T23:18:00.007+08:00

지금은,에픽하이의 노래 듣고있어
나는 아름다운 가사 만들고 싶어... 타블로 처럼.
가끔 널 보면,아무 이유 없이 내 가슴이 아파.
다듀 군대 있으니까,가요씬가 너무 지루해.
슬픈 엔딩 너무 싫어!
내 꿈을 아직 찾고있어...찾을 수 있을까?
사랑...도대체 뭔데?
음악 없는 세상이 지옥이다.
행복해 살자!
내 魂이 너는 필요해.

I hate it that when i try to string together sentences in korean,they end up being incredibly random.
NEED.TO.EXPAND.KOREAN.VOCABULARY: PRONTO!

5 people i would like to be stuck in the elevator with.

2009-11-01T23:00:00.019+08:00

Disclaimer : Elevator in this case does not include the ones in HDB flats,coz that totally ruins the picture.

1. MYK
Normally I would say,Tablo but nowadays I am loving MYK's rare tracks online.I love his rhymes and they always make me think a whole lot.I think MYK's super smart and he's an amazing musician! I would ask him when he's album is dropping and act like a cool and composed fan. (I think i can pull of 'cool and composed' with him,just coz he gives of this very laid back,chill vibe -- WHICH will be extremely comforting if i get stuck in an elevator. Also, I would take a real good look at the tattoo on his wrist. I really like it.

2.Edward Monkton

WHO IS MY ULTIMATE HOMEBOY RIGHT NOW. (yes,i said 'homeboy') I would somehow inspire him in some way to make a drawing of the girl in the elevator and her joyous self. (which will be me,PAHA) Maybe,he will have some spare paper with him and do the drawing right away.And then,he will publish a book with a continuation of the drawings and the book will be named 'The girl in the elevator.'(which will be me!) Soon,whilst I am browsing through the shelves in the library,I will see this book and my life will be complete.I will borrow it and not return it (NO MATTER WHAT THE FINE.)
....one can dream.

3.Jughead
I believe wholeheartedly that Jughead is the best Archie character.Heck,I dont even get what the big deal is with Archie.He has freckles and really orange hair! Whilst Jugehead is very handsome and nice and has great taste in food. I've always secretly wanted Jughead to be with Betty.Just coz Betty pwns (and one issue,Jughead brought Betty to one of Riverdale's 193023910 dances when Archie dumped Betty for the clearly uglier Veronica -- I really like them together) In the elevator,I would share any food i have with Jughead and we will have a picnic,in the elevator.Then after we are rescued,Jughead will bring me to 'Pop's' and we will have one of those milk shake thinghys that always look so good in the comics.

4. Ellen Degeneres
I know Ellen appears in almost every of my '5.....' list,but that just proves how awesome she is! Ellen is funny and spunky and lesbian(but thats not the point) and she's an amazing person.I think I would probably freak out but its okay because everybody in close affinity with Ellen freaks out (Refer:Team Ellen from New Zealand and Taylor Swift,recently) Ellen will then talk about her elevator experience on the Ellen show and get me tickets! AND THEN I WILL GET THOSE COOL GIFTS SHE GIVES AND DANCE AWKWARDLY DURING HER INTRO. PLEASE?

5. Mc Mong.

Just cause he's really funny and charismatic in his own ways. Mc Mong's my favourite in 1N2D and nobody can hate him because he is extremely likable.Also because,I really like his tattoos and would love to look at them.(DNW,i suddenly have this thing with looking at tattoos) I would talk to him in english and see him cower in awkwardness. After that,we will become friends and develop an oppa-dongsaeng relationship.PAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

consistency is for losers.

2009-10-31T21:17:00.002+08:00

So today i had a flu and because flu's make you bored i re-did the blog.
I always feel really happy when i re-do my blogs.All that HTML makes me happy. & i updated my links.It makes me feel better that my link list is longer. PAHAHAHAHAHA.

the undead.

2009-10-27T01:52:00.006+08:00

I will be one to tell you that despite the fad,I think vampires are pretty rad.

They encompass everything mysterious and practically define the overly used term -- 'haunted past'
Currently,the salvatore brothers gets my vote.I love Stephan,but currently Damon is so badasss I like him more.yes yes,i know Edward and the boys can hold their own but its nothing compared to one half of the salvatore brothers! and unlike Edward,when they crave blood they dont appear to be constipated (Thank you very much Robert Pattinson)

wonder if there are asian vampires.holy crap,that will be awesome.

life is a sauna - hot,sweaty and uncomfortable.

2009-10-24T22:53:00.004+08:00

I THINK I HAVE BECOME BORING.

T_________T

when the cold world suddenly feels strangely comfortable.

2009-10-17T01:08:00.006+08:00

I wonder what a mid-life crisis feels like. When someone goes through a mid-life crisis do they feel constantly suffocated,a tight-sharp pain that tugs on their chest's?Like a hollow void in their souls? Like how Bella felt when Edward left her in New Moon?
or is it just something that plays on their minds mostly,like a warped mind game,constantly revolving around the question : IS THIS THE LIFE THAT I WANT? Maybe it doesnt reach the depths of their sould per se,maybe it just feels like an annoying itch that you cant reach? Maybe.
I really want to know what it feels like because I am almost certain that my appa is going through the second lapse of his mid-life crisis.Somehow,all his mid-life crisis solutions involve expensive motorcycles he doesnt need.Perhaps its the notion of "the wind in my hair as I drive off into the sunset in my harley" that makes him feel better about his lost youth(Uhuh. Cue the desert highway scene that leads to 'Las Vegas')

The problem is a) my dad doesnt have much hair and b) there are no desert highways.

Now I wonder,will I go through a mid-life crisis one day? and what I will do to cope with it. I hope its not by spending vast amounts of money on something insignificant like vehicles or things from IKEA. IF I do have to go through an age-related crisis -- I would go on a 73hour movie marathon with free flow of popcorn and Hugh Grant/Jackman/Dancy/Laurie. oooo! I might want to add Pitt and Reynolds to the mix too,just for fun. And OMG! you cannot forget Uncle Depp.
Oh Yes,In my opinion Uncle Depp will be the ultimate cure to a life crisis.

i love h(u)gh.

2009-10-15T00:47:00.003+08:00

This is my favourite scene from About a boy.
brilliant,just brilliant.
especially 3:16 onwards. seriously,hugh grant is win.

this is my jam.

2009-10-10T16:14:00.005+08:00

suhaidah,your bed is too comfy especially on new sheets day.you need to learn the concept of waking up on time.Typically,when you reach the age of 10,your supposed to have mastered this concept already.but alas! you have never been typical.Nope,not since the day your mom gave birth to you and the hair on your newborn head stood up like little soldiers at attention.

wake up su,you are too young to sleep.
깨어나라! 벌써 잠들기에는 너무 젋다 / MTS.

Need to post this because of its epic-ness.Everytime i listen to this,i get this fuzzy feeling that makes my heart feel heavy all of a sudden.My itunes is seriously going to be starving when Dynamic Duo goes to the korean army T_T. I NEED MY MUSICAL NUTRITION DAMNIT.Anyways,LISTEN!This kind of amazing doesnt come everyday.
ps,gaeko: your voice reaches the depths of my soul and
i kinda love you,a whole lot.

strawberry tea blackmail.

2009-10-08T23:19:00.010+08:00

3 cinema visits in 2 days baby!
Paper heart & 500 days of Summer back to back was vair entertaining.
Paper heart was incredibly cute,im not even joking.HAHAHA TO THE CHRISTMAS SONG. charlene yi is wicked and she has this charmingly misplaced dimple.I will not start on Michael Cera whom I think is the epitome of indie boy. (aka he is love) The movie is funny as hell. CHARLENE YI FTW.
500 DOS was beautifully made.I loved Joseph Gordon-Levitt and his love-beliving self and Zooey Deschanel is very gorgeous.
Im not going to compare them because they are both epic in their own ways.

You know,both movies revolve around people questioning love-whether it truly exists or is it really a fantasy we make up to make the crude world more bearable? and honestly,after about 5+ hours of both movies questioning love, I still cannot figure out exactly where I stand with this insanely confusing notion.
This is what I think : By the intrinsic nature or the god-making order of how the world is created,i think that all humans are made for a particular other,that there is one for me,one for you,one for uncle depp,one for uncle tan (whoever he is). But the thing is,amongst the 7 billion people on earth,what are the chances that you and your 'one' find each other?Hell,your one might not even be alive YET or is already dead! It is incredibly possible that the one that's 'made for you' lived in another country or even another CENTURY all together.(I mean,imagine-- your 'one' could have been a really hot samurai from pre war Japan or something.) so yeah,i guess only the most lucky amongst us find our 'one'.Most of the time,we just compromise our 'ones' for 'twos'.
This is what I think .

but then again,i also think that in the future i will have a house on top of a mountain with ponies and skittles and rainbows and Hugh Jackman/Wolverine.So yes,to hell what i think.PAHAHAHA.

ps; i would so totally dig it if my 'one' was a hot samurai.

jack,rose and the panabaker sisters.

2009-10-07T20:08:00.002+08:00

Today was extremely good given that i was practically begging mama to let me skip PW lecture today.My feet ached and my toes curled in naturally for the need of more sleep. BTW,Yesterday's J1 Bash was definitely worth the 10 bucks.09A302 REPRESENT,BIATCHES. and everyone looked exceptionally great and twas fun letting loose,completely. Thaks to AFIQAH for making ze event so great!

Anyways,today after the PW concentration camp and Ms Wong deathly glare during PW tuto,Khai and me started talking about movies/dramas in the bus home.AND BECAUSE ALL GREAT IDEAS SPAWN FROM BUS 39-RIDES, we decided to go watch either Paper Heart or 500 days spontaneously. The thing is, living in yishun and commuting to pasir ris everyday have made us distance-phobic and the idea of taking the MRT allllll the way to Dhoby Ghaut to catch the movies at the only availiable place,The Cathay was too frightening.So we decided to eat first at Eighteen Chefs which was an eyeopening experience to say the least.(PAHAHAHA KHAI.) Then after eating and having those really long conversations about movies and actresses and our severe dislike for Kristen Stewart as Bella and an epic discussion on the forever epic,TITANIC. we were basically too lazy to move our butts anywhere out of northpoint.
so out of utter random spontaneity, we went to watch 'Fame' at the yishun10 cinema. PAHAHAHAHA. like where the hell did that idea come from?

PS. Fame was okay, a bunch of nobody's and a severely miscasted 'Kay Panabaker' who looks too playhouse disney for the film and Asher Book whom we BOTH SWORE we have seen him somewhere before but as it turns out -- he is a nobody.Btw,there were only 4 people in the cinema: us and this very very very pro PDA and intimate couple in the same cinema.(like seriously kids,why a cinema? its not even funny,its gross. and your wasting money on tickets!)

tomorrow -- 500 DAYS & PAPER HEART.
I LOVE YOU,POST PROMOS!

tomorrow,tomorrow i love you tomorrow-your only a day awaaay~!

2009-10-05T22:43:00.006+08:00

Tomorrow i will break out of this heavy,metal chains that entrap me to the supposed pillar of life : Education.I will run out into the wilderness of long awaited freedom where the sun shines bright with korean dramas and pirated movies on the net i have so dearly missed and there is no rain or blizzards or typhoons or volcanic eruptions or studying to ruin my parade.Where i walk with a bunny-induced sping in my step and leap like a freaking frog into the abyss of post-promos,without a care in the world.Just euphoria and rainbows and skittles and ponies,on top of a mountain with Hugh Jackman/Wolverine or Hugh Dancy/Adam. (whatever works.)

WHY DOES YOUTUBE HATE ME?

17- for the first time.

2009-10-03T00:16:00.005+08:00

if people ask me ( i dont know why they would want to ask,maybe i'll meet an extremely random alien someday?) : What did you do when you were 17?
i would say calmly-like its the best thing ever : I was being tortured by the Education system,period.

The last few day have just been brain saturation hell. I keep visioning that my brain was on a conveyer belt that led to a organ grinding machine (like the one Helena Bonham Carter had on Sweeney Todd) and that if I even tried to put in a few more chapters of geography,my brain will be grinded into mush. All the veins and pinky stuff thats suppose to be my brain-- all mushy and soupy like mushroom Campbell soup.
(Please think of this image in your minds. It is a beautiful picture oozing with intelligence.PAHAH!)

17 was good. I wish i could experience the thrill of an epiphany on my birthday. Like suddenly enlightment will behold me and I will glow with all of life's questions answered. but noooooooo- the closest thing to an epiphany yesterday was - " FUCK. CASE STUDIES!"
Also, very much love to yuding,ruzzie and ruohan for the DORAEMON CAKE and their attempt to surprise me in my house yesterday. (A for effort guys!) HAHAHAH,okay honestly- thank you for that! you guys are the best and i dont think i would ever find better substitutes for friends. (this means you guys are stuck with me forever! PAHA! wuruohan likes this because this means she can eat off my food supplies anytime) +,much love to Shubaa for the midnight call and everyone who wished me yesterday <3!

Paper Hearts,500days of summer,Time traveller's wife after promos marathon.
WHO'S WITH ME?( and khai coz we decided to do it together.PAHA)

state of mind.

2009-09-29T22:36:00.003+08:00

one word : promos.
no actually,make that three words
:Promos and Fear.

i am on a 15 minute break right now because my brain is beyond its phreatic zone right now.
(see how i just repeated 'right now' twice?)
dear god,i need your guidance and uhm..help
please?

Dont blame the DJ,its the playlist!

2009-09-19T02:59:00.006+08:00

its 3AM & i just came back from the 24/7 heaven that is Mustafa. We did our traditional sweet/junk food buying for raya today. (we buy loads loads of junk saying that it's for the guests that come to our house,but who are we kidding!- 90% of the junk will be eaten by us. HEHEHEHE)

Initially i was dead mad at my mom today (dont ask me why,i forgot) but then she bought me new sheets from Aussino and i felt happy and wasnt angry at her anymore. Bed sheets are the best form of bribery,imo.

Btw,epik high released their double CD tittled [e] this week. I am in musical heaven,every track is mind-blowing. I find myself just listening intently on my bed,with my earphones,picking up wordplay,irony, and pure genius in the lyrics. I did that for 4 hours today. I didnt even feel bored. It just occured to me that there's a lot of ear candy now. I feel like im reaching musical zen. (okay,not to that extent..but you get the point) Everybody should listen to [e] and feel enlightenment. I am also extremely in love with all the collaborations on the album. Dok2 is the future! & Dumbfoundead is amaaazing, and MYK never dissappoints. (they're all fairly sexy too. Dok2 (Y PLZ) I am definitely getting the album,already ordered my copy! oh btw,although Tablo is and will forever be my lyrical genius,I officially declare that DJ Tukutz aka Street T is officially the TURNTABLIST of my heart. Will get down to penning down my favourite lyrics from the album soon,honestly everything is just amazing.

Before i die,i really (REALLY) want a musical genius to write a song for me (just like how Gaeko and Choiza wrote 'Good Love' for their girlfriends and Tablo wrote 'Heaven' for his future wife) and how Dougie uhh.. wrote Transylvania for uhh.. randomness?) I want an amazing song thats filled with inside jokes only the two of us understand and lots of wordplay (like how Petruchio 'woos' Katherina) and with the acoustic guitar and with nice beats and an intro with speaking voices (ILOVETHAT IN SONGS!) God,can i have one please? (okay,if its not a full song,a verse will be okay too.lol. cannot be picky as there are very little musical geniuses left in the world.)

Also,much to the excitement of the english speaking world, I find myself listening to more english songs (Although,language has never been and will never be a barrier for me with music) This is because of my re-ignited love with Mcfly.I get very excited because i can discuss Mcfly with Khai every morning like about which parts Jones > Fletcher and how Harry is quite insignificant.hehehehe.
i think if Danny's singing voice was something marry-able (is that a word?) i would definitely marry it(?) because its just pure awesome,really.

I wonder how people survived when music wasnt widespread. (was there ever a time?) Music-deprivation would be the worse punishment ever imo. I get/feel way way way way uncomfortable and insecure when i dont have my earphones on any form of transportation. (its a bit of a stretch coz even if im talking to somebody i have half of the earphones on.) That's why when i dont have new songs on my ipod i get cranky and complain. A world without Tablo/epik high,Dynamic Duo, cheesy kpop songs that make you smile, John Mayer and addictive beats? zomg,just bury me alive;I'll make the earthworms devouring my body sing 'stand by you' in accapella and be happier dead than alive.

In a totally different note,i have decided how i want people to describe me. when people ask 'what kind of person is su?' for me,the best thing you can say is: ' Weird and Wonderful'
That kind of answer will make me incredibly happy. (please take note.PAHAHAHA)
oh btw, please dont say "Weird but Wonderful" because the word 'but' just undermines Weird and makes it seem like Weird is bad. No,weird is good. Weird is the new way of life. This is the post-normal era.)

I feel happy despite the fact that promos is shit close. Maybe its pre-festive optimism or maybe its the no-sleep induced high.The latter,most probably.

Danny's straight hair -- check!

2009-09-13T23:40:00.003+08:00

you know the feeling when you find your old photos where you look so happy and young (back then,you hadnt yet realised how harsh the world is) or when you find your past journals (when blogs werent as cool as keeping a diary or journal) or when you listen to one of your favourite songs from before or when your reminded of some past phases that you had? I felt a lot of it today.

And it felt a lot like -- home.

5 favourite leading men.

2009-09-12T22:36:00.012+08:00

again,for fun!

1.Seonu Hwan from Capital Scandal

Ohmy.ohmy,where do we start?
Capital Scandal is my favourite drama of all time and mostly because of Seon Woo Hwan. (or just,Hwan) Hwan was an amazingly written character-- All confident and charismatic on the outside but with a slightly bruised past concerning a death of a brother and the betrayal of a friend.
oh,when he drinks from a cup,he lifts his pinky up.PAHAHAHAHAHA.
I want to meet the non-fictional version of Hwan plz.

2.Edward scissorhands

FAVOURITE TIM BURTON CHARACTER HANDS DOWN.
whats not to love? I think he's the epitome of irony. Delicate,caring,naive and childlike inside but yet he's basically a dangerous,metallic thorn on the outside.
When i first watched Edward,i was afraid like shizz (the opening scene does kind of remind you of Frankenstein. uhuh) Yet after the film,i wanted an Edward.I wanted my mom to go and find an Edward and bring him home so i can be a Winona Ryder.
(plus: he gives great-but-weird haircuts!)

3.Lee Tae Jo from Partner

My current rave! I love love love him.
The black sheep of an evil family with a pretty much bastard of a father and a lack thereof of a mother and a misunderstood brother. (how's that for family dynamics!)
and he has this catchphrases that he says that kills me everytime!

4.Gregory House

No words can describe the genius that is Dr.House.
i love how although,everything that he does is basically so ridiculous to the point of madness,i still find myself rooting for House anyways.
and he's a genius! (genius is definitely a plus point!)Although,the last season ends with him going to rehab...
even geniuses are flawed! god is fair.
CANNOT WAIT FOR NEW SEASON.

5.Michael Scofield

those eyes!
nuff-said.

iamokay.

2009-09-08T23:38:00.004+08:00

currently:went to korean class,freezed to almost death,developed flu-like symptoms,fever developing steadily,throat feels like its on fire everytime i swallow and my backaches are making me feel like i am 70 years old.

has decided to lay off the fangirl for awhile coz im kinda tired of being so hardcore for so long.Not denying that fangirling was not fun,it was/is but everything just decided to feel exhausting only now,its like a clump of exhaustion snowballing from the time i decided that i liked DBSK and did not like SNSD.However,will not stop loving the language,the music or the artists.Just laying off the fan-wars and sarcastic commenting,checking for news all the time and the constant need to defend the groups that i like.This means i will stop hating snsd too because that leads to fan wars,sarcastic comments,checking for news all the time AND the need to defend the groups i like compared to snsd.

Somehow(probably with some help from the heavens),after today and being exhausted and sick,i have ceased to care so much for about things mentioned above.

is very serious about cleansing self with underground hip-hop.Dok2's mixtape is on repeat.
(i might have sneaked in Dynamic Duo's albums too. theyre not underground but whoshizzing cares.I am going to be cleansed)

the beats,the beats keep callin me~!

park jaybeom;my 2cents.

2009-09-08T17:40:00.005+08:00

Up till now,i am half still in disbelief of what happened today.I cannot say that i am completely calmed now but i feel that if i dont write this down i will self-combust.When it first started i was annoyed then i was upset,then furious then genuinely worried then shocked then really,really sad and now all i feel helpless,listless,__-less. the works.It feels like a small but significant part of me is missing.am trying to be all mature fan girl about this but geez,it is hard.I will try to make myself feel better by writing this,even if it looks like the most pathetic attempt):

Im in no way the biggest 'Hottest' around but god knows i love 2pm.You know,to me what ever happened or what Jay said or didnt say doesnt matter.Heck,it didnt even bother me at all.Now that i think about it,im not even as furious at the mafia gang of netizens who have too much hate stuck up their asses as before.On the way home,after Van called me to say what happened and after Jane's text,surprisingly i wasnt thinking about 2pm's future activities or what not.What affected me more was what Jay was going through.Being attacked with such despicable comments by a bunch of beings that have no lives that they find enjoyment in demeaning others.Jay endured 4 days,heck i dont even think i can even handle one ): I kinda realise that 2pm's future is not really important now.Although when i first heard he was going,like everyone else i didnt want it to happen,didnt believe it,wanted KHOTTEST to start a riot at the airport to make sure that plane does not leave,but now as i think again i realise that its best for Jay to go back.At least for me,i wouldnt want one of my favourite entertainers to have to endure that kind of hate and to stay in that condition he was in.Even if he wasnt Park Jaybeom-the gorgeous man that he is,as a human being,i wouldnt want someone to be in that kind of low situation because of what he said on MYSPACE(when has myspace or fb even be considered legit enough to be taken seriously!)Im pretty sure it felt like the entire nation was turning against him,and im damned sure that feeling is not fun.not fun at all.
So i guess,i want Jay to go.I want him to feel better and get healthier in his hometown with his family.That being said,i want him to comeback when he feels as good as new,when he wants to-even if it takes years.Because that kind of talent,should never be wasted even if it was because of words lost in cultural translation.

Im going to go on a whim and say that i still believe Jay will come back when all this dies down and netizens repent their sins or die (doesnt matter,whatever works) I still believe that JYP will use his magic powers and make 2pm full again- with Jay.I still believe that the 2pm we see in Wild Bunny just a week ago will appear in front of our eyes again.If not soon,then later.Doesnt matter,whatever works.I will wait,eventhough i hate waiting because this is something i must wait for.I am not going to hate on people because that will just make me equal to the beings that blew this out of proportion.
Someday,i know i will get to see my favourite beasty brothers up on stage again.
I hope that Taec is okay.(even in times of despair,biasedness is evident.Ah,the human nature)

For now,I think i want to take a break with this fandom thing.Looking back on the whole,It is very exhausting trying to be clear-headed and 'chill' in this godforsaken world of fangirl-ing.I cannot handle all this excessive sadness,heartache or anger now.Will come back to fandom when i feel like it. till then,i will cleanse myself with underground hip hop and uhh..promos.

난 한상 우리 리드자 믿고 사랑해.
앞으로도,난 언제까지 2pm 와 재범 응원할께요.
씨에털에서 아프지마,건강하게 살자!
리드자 올때까지,난 기다릴께요.
기도할께요 ^^

5 people i would want to trade lives with for a day.

2009-09-05T18:36:00.012+08:00

Not because i hate myself or my life.Just for fun.
in no particular order:

1.William Shakespeare

because who wouldnt want to know the inner musings of Shakespeare!
what are his honest opinions and what he REALLY meant to say when he wrote 'Taming of the Shrew'. whether he liked Kate or Bianca more,my personal opinion is that he liked Kate more but one can never be so sure.
More importantly,I would also want to know if he was gay,so that my curiosity will be at peace.

2.Tablo

aaaaaaah. because i want to know where he hides all that genius which is him and because i want to know what goes through his mind when he wrote 'Pieces of you' and 'Umbrella' and 'Map the Soul'.I also want to be him for a day so i can see the wonder which is DJ Tukutz when he is drunk and asleep.PAHAHAHA. Plus,i really want to know who he thinks about when he disses in songs.

3.Ellen Degeneres

because she is win!and i want to know what its like to swing the other way with Portia (not that i want to myself.(god,no)but because curiosity eats me alive) I also want to do the Ellen show for one day and dance around the oval table that she has (it always looks so fun and nobody gives a damn if your dancing well or not!) and give everybody free Beats by Dr.Dre and keep one for myself and make ellen(me) send a copy to the real me.HAHAHAH.

4.Johnny Depp

because he is Johnny Depp,the epitome of sexy.I would spend the day enjoying being incredibly sexy and gloriously basking in everything mysterious that is Johnny Depp's mind .(even if his thoughts fall below expectations.no wait,scratch that.With Johnny Depp there is no bar of expectation.There is only genius in the true-est form)btw,i really really like this picture.

5.Bridget Jones

because she is my favourite movie heroine.(i think so,i have never seriously thought about this before but i guess Bridget Jones and Rebecca Bloomwood are my favourites) I want to be her for one day because i want to have a chance to think out loud all the time (not that i dont do it now,but Bridget's thoughts are way more interesting than mine!) and to be hilarious as hell!more importantly,because she gets to choose between Daniel Cleaver and Mark Darcy. I would also want to know how it feels like to be British.They always seem to have the most interesting sense of humour.

that really was fun! but kinda difficult to think of who.I must really like myself.PAHAHA!
okay,off to study like a drugged genius now.(not that i am. but you getit.) ZZZZZ,the clock that appa put in my room is very noisy.I hear the 'tic-toc-tic-toc' very clearly-- and i have one side of my earphones on! GEEZ. i bet this is a scheme my dad came up with to get me to manage my time well. It's working alright.I am now well aware of EVERY SECOND that's passing with me not studying. THANK YOU,APPA!

ps! im saying this again for emphasis--That Johnny Depp picture is gorgeous.(ah,mr depp!)
pps! HE'S THE SAME AGE AS MY DAD.
ppps! ewwww su. why must you say that?

i am indulging in this blog post coz i can.

2009-09-05T17:28:00.006+08:00

I love the smell of newly-washed bedsheets,they make me happy.Especially,white sheets from Aussino.(the ones im using now were meant for my little brother - it has footballs on them.They are charming,really!)It's a weird sensation.Just like when it suddenly starts pouring,i open my mother's bedroom window to smell the rain on the hot,tar road.I like that smell too.

Anyways,today has been a very exciting news day,on the kpop scene that is. TABLO aka the lyrical genius of my heart is getting married (and he's gonna be a dad) imagine little Tablo's running around.damn,i can already predict them to be little geniuses.I love Kang Hye Jung (his future wife) because she's an amazingly quirky actress.but still,i feel somekind of a loss.Marriage is such a humanly common thing to do,i kinda half-expected my life hero to be beyond humanly common.
but no suhaidah,your life hero however much his music and lyrics speak the language of your soul-is a human and humanly common is a given. (aka everybody deserves to be happy.)

Yesterday was 2pm's first anniv.and although i didnt celebrate it with cake and a spazz session(eh afrah? lol) I went to watch the debut videos because i miss 10점 만점애 10점(refer Fig 1.0) very much.When a lot of fans were only into 2pm after 'Again & Again' or after they came down to Singapore for kpop night,i clearly remember being very very excited about every 10점 만점애 10점 performance and how dorky/tall taec was/is.I like 'Hottest time of the day' more than 'time for change' actually.More being earnest in music shows because they were newbies than being retardedly funny on variety shows because they can.(not that i dont like the last part too.)
am waiting patiently for their comeback.AND NETZENS,LEAVE JAY ALONE damnit. go study or find a job.geezbeezz!

Yesterday i had a dream i saw Daesung after he recovered from his surgery and i stared at his nose up close for a very very long time (in dream time) to see if there was any difference.Why do weird dreams always happen to me?!For once,i want a perfectly normal dream which involves me in some kind of happy ending with ponies,skittles,rainbows and a house on top a mountain.

my REM life sucks!

edit/

Fig 1.0
my favourite 10점 만점애 10점 performance!On their debut week,3rd performance on Mucore.I like it the most coz of Jay in Blue and because Taec's especially perky in this one.

in between

2009-09-02T22:53:00.002+08:00

i hate it when im hovering between sick and not sick. When i feel the need to drink Coke and 100 PLUS and gorge myself with food coz the early stages of flu just makes you very hungry.I hate this.I swear,tomorrow morning i will hate the fact that i will have an internal dilemma on whether to go to school or not.School is so lifeless,every conversation we have will somehow in some sad,sinister way be linked back to promos.I swear,it sucks the life out of me.Icing on the cake : ECONS PAPER ON ZE BIRTHDAY. if that's not fate,nothing is.ah,life is bliss!

i feel kind of stupid now.
@ 3:45pm today,whilst i cooked my maggi mee to eat (secretly,of course).
Mama : Aida,yesterday you never go korean class!
Me: What? yesterday wasnt Tuesday, yesterday was TEACHER'S DAY LAA.
Mama : *uh-huh look*
Me: ohshit,yesterday WAS Tuesday.
pwned.

a plankton is in my brain.

2009-08-27T21:22:00.004+08:00

I think im losing it,but in the most sane way possible.Im losing it,sanely? Yes, i am aware of the contradiction embodied in the statement.Its weird,i dont know how to explain it.I will try anyway.

It's like i know that my thoughts are going haywire and my thought process seems likes its jumping beyond rationality.I think about things or people that i should definitely not and absolutely must not think about.I cant control my thoughts anymore,it like some other being is controlling my brain.I imagine this 'being' to be a plankton-like creature sitting in the centre of my brain with a remote control;jumbling all my thoughts together like it was his giant veiny-playground.the plankton-like creature laughs evily when it succeeds in making me think the way it wants to.I can hear its laughter,its mocking me and i feel like squeezing it dry.
thus i conclude that because i partially have no more control of my thoughts,i am losing it.going crazy.the mad-woman in the attic.GILA.미쳤어.

The sane part -- Although my thoughts run wild like toddlers with too much sugar,i seem to be retain normality(normal by my standards anyway) in reality.The thoughts in my mind are not transferred out of my mouth or through my actions.Its all very puzzling.
This leads me to believe that i really am turning crazy.

HOW D:? that being said,even if i turn crazy,its good-crazy right? since technically,my thoughts torment nobody but myself? hmmm. yes yes. i guess there are positives in this!
like uhmm...who else has a micro-organism in their brains?
hopefully the evil plankton does not misplace or burn the thought-file where i save all the things i need for promos,as it is the file's arent anywhere complete or full T__T.

im sticking with rudolph.

2009-08-21T00:42:00.004+08:00

If you were Bridget Jones,who would you choose?

the god-like,sexy manslut of a boss
(but still,godlike!)
or

the one that 'likes you,just as you are'
(who wears a rudolph sweater just coz his mom gave it to him)
(did i mention he's a human rights lawyer?)

i love bridget jones. she is beautifully flawed and hilarious to the core.
book was better than the movie though (whats new)
it doesnt take away the fact that hugh grant is sexy,no matter what year it is or what time period or what hideous haircut he is sporting.

now,not tomorrow.

2009-08-20T00:06:00.007+08:00

currently: waiting for the way way way overdued urban notes to be printed.Yes,i know that the modules gonna end.I feel helpless and heavy-hearted thinking of the studying that i've been neglecting.This,ever so evident in the backlog of tutorials and assignments that i have managed accumulate way more efficiently than the savings in my POSB.I really do not like the lazy,dependent creature that i am now D:
For this,i pray my hardest that i will overcome this phase of slow-motion self-demise.I pray that i will have enough endurance to say 'my will is strong,my books are open.i really want to study!' I pray that with ever failed attempt at binomial,i do not give in to the math devil.I pray that i will not start hating the things i used to love so dearly.I pray that,in the midst of this battle,i will at least retain the little sanity i have left.I pray that,when all of this is over,we will all be OKAY.

on a lighter,less harsh-reality-just-kicked-me-in-the ass note,Daesung's operation went well.
:D I feel better with that notion in my mind.
'whenever you see me...' -GAEKO.

cash,money,soul,magic.

2009-08-15T00:20:00.006+08:00

Most of the time i go to youtube,i'd search one thing and that will lead to 839839391839 other things,which causes me to spend more time there than supposed to.

So just for fun,these are the things i find myself typing on the search bar tonight.

Tiger JK Yoon Mi Rae
Alex Clazziquai
Supreme Team
The Movement Crew
Dok2
Kang Ji Hwan
Adam movie
500 days of Summer
YG family
1tym

and although i feel like posting every single video i viewed today,im afraid blogger cant handle the sudden video embedding.PAHAHA.

True Romance- Tiger JK with his wife,Yoon Mi Rae.
i love this! Tiger JK is extremely sexy and him and Yoonmirae make a extremely talented and beautiful couple.Jordan has amazing parents.

Supermagic-Supreme Team.
i love this too!The choreography's raaaad.
Simon Dominic. swoons.

Tell yourself-Clazziquai
i lovelovelove this! Horan's and Alex's voice are perfectly in harmony and with the nice elecronic beats,geez! love!
ALEX CHU,WHYAREYOUSOHANDSOME?
*adds meeting Alex into to-do list before i die.*

atlas ftw;

i will walk around the hole.

2009-08-12T22:59:00.005+08:00

As i sit on my bed,typing this whilst listening to lee minki's new mini album* and finishing up calling the rest of 'roll the coconut' participants for funfestique tomorrow**,somewhere in a VIP room in some hospital in Seoul;Kang Daesung is in pain.
and it feels like one of my closest friends is in the hospital and i feel the urgency to go to the hospital and comfort him,eventhough i hate hospitals because they remind me of pain and pills and death.

But he is not my close friend and i cannot take a taxi down to the hospital where he resides in pain and say 'its okay,your going to be alright.'

This,I know and it makes me feel and look more pathetic than i already am considering the fact that i am just a fangirl,whom some people might even find borderline creepy for me to feel for someone i dont know personally.True,but it doesnt take away the fact that he broke his nose and probably suffers the trauma of crashing into a dark abyss of semi-consiousness or the fact that he makes my darker days suddenly brighter with his voice or the fact that his smiles make me happy albeit in the most superficial ways or the fact that in my mind,one day we will meet and fall in love and share inside jokes that only we know of.(hehehehehehehe)No,my pathetic-ness does not take away those small but significant thoughts.Im okay with being pathetic,coz its the truth and since im not middle-aged and balding or job-less or failing backwards,i am still able to handle the truth and not be dragged down by it.

And maybe one day,ill grow out of being pathetic.Well,hopefully i will.but for now,i guess ill have to roll around in this pit of helpless-ness till the korean press reveals he is truly,okay.btw,this is not a depressing post.i swear.Im just mildly disturbed that there's nothing i can do and me realising that its okay to be pathetic and admitting it as it is okay to embrace your flaws and accepting them.(unless you dont have flaws and have extremely quick reflexes that produce answers to math problems at the speed of light.then,god made you perfect.)

*-Lee Minki's mini album is surprisingly good for a crossover actor-singer.It does help that he and me have similar hairstyles.pahahaha! (refer Fig 1.0)
**-FUNFESTIQUE! ohmyohmy.I am infinitely proud of my atlas house members and the lovable atlas hc for doing so well and giving their best in Funfestique so far,really.Last two days,let's kick it in full gear,bananas! Btw,im playing 'roll the coconut' tmrw.No matter how i think about it now,i think 'roll the coconut' sounds very kampong-ish.Not that i am from a kampong or a village or the slums of Jakarta for that matter,abang mohan.TSKTSKTSK.

Fig 1.0

Remember Us.

2009-08-10T20:04:00.003+08:00

Watched Triston & Isolde,finally today.( I love mj's dvd shelf.)

i like it,knowing epic historical love stories; there are never happy endings but you still feel satisfied nonetheless.& James Franco will forever remind me of Spiderman,but he made a nice Triston too.(btw,Triston forever reminds me of Triton which reminds of Nabila and 09A201. HARHAR.)Then i went to khai's blog and saw the trailer for Hugh Dancy's latest (sort of?) movie "Adam" and got too excited for my own good. Then i went to ellie from seoulbeats' blog because i kind of blog-stalk her cause i think she's really cool. (i am not creepy.you do it too!)

and i saw the trailer for Paper Heart starring Charlene Yi and Michael Cera.

& i decided that im going to watch this the MOMENT it comes out.(on the internet lah,if i waited for it to arrive in Singapore... i'd be 21)
WATCH!

WHY DOES MICHAEL CERA PLAY THE SAME TYPE OF CHARACTER ALL THE TIME?!
im not complaining though.
more cera-love!

now im tempted to watch 'love actually' for the 32747283th time.
i think im on a roll.
MUST STOP.

ohmysizzwizzles.

2009-08-10T16:00:00.005+08:00

The moment i logged into IVLE,i knew it wasnt going to be pretty.
I HATE CLICKING ON THAT ANNOYING BLINKING ANNOUNCEMENTS BUTTON.

all of a sudden everything i have at the back of my head like : gp assignment,maths TYS,omgsuyouhaventpayattentiontoanythingforURBAN,promos,promos,FUCK!ITSPROMOS coupled with everything on the announcements like:comepreparedfortutorial:geog,econs test this week,URBANTESTNEXTWEEK.OMFG! and things ms pearlin likes to say like:"Pls do not copy from your friends. Anyone found letting your friends copy or copy from your friends, I will be very upset :( " or "3 weeks to PROMOS",i see everything all rolled up into a giant tsunami thats 5 floors tall and i become like Johnny Depp in the Spongebob squarepants special and i suddenly dissappear into the huge tsunami-wave.

gahh,i hate this. T_T.

give me the light.

We become normal only when we go crazy

2009-08-09T02:44:00.006+08:00

wanted to change blogskins suddenly.dont know why.
maybe this is an omen.

the quotes above are from dynamic duo's beyond the wall.

손을 뻗어봐 손을 뻗어봐
이제 한계라는 커튼을 걷어봐

because i cant help myself and coz epik needs more love,im lifting from tablo's blog@mapthesoul.
THIS IS CLASSIC!
rofled@mithra for the longest time.

EPIK,the way i love them.
Tukutz,Tablo,MithraJin.

let's leave all the hard stuff for later.

2009-08-08T23:06:00.002+08:00

THINGS I DID SINCE THE LONG WEEKEND STARTED.

'celebrated' National Day in school.It wasnt hyped which was sad coz national day in yt was like one of the biggest events and they'll be parade and a lot of running around trying to catch mr teo and matthew after that to take pictures with them. (HAHAHA. ruohan,shubaa,me and the little but hot guys in yt!)
went to the library alone.which i love because when i choose my books i want to take my time,without the pressure of being with someone and trying to fit them in my browsing schedule.I like to round the shelves 832938791 times until i think ive found the right books. the books which i take,read the sypnopsis and say "THIS IS IT!" right away.
Watched 'nur kasih' on sensasi on friday night after class.Dont know why,but i really like it.its not nonsensical like most malaysian dramas. then i watched '2days1night' and couldnt stop grinning everytime the camera showed lee seung ki. he is too lovely,i swear.
Today,we went to johor to buy baju kurung for hari raya.WE ALWAYS GET IT EARLY COZ WE'RE TOO LAZY TO GO OUT DURING FASTING MONTH. i got a black one and a purple one. but i dont really care coz they all look the same to me.
then to city square where we shopped and i had to fold my arms the entire time we were 1m away from the shoe shops coz they had a sale.I refrained coz i just bought shoes a few weeks ago.BUT THEN MY SISTER BOUGHT VANS' NEW LOAFERS and i was so happy coz i thought we could share,BUT NOOOO. she has small feet. T_T
now i feel like crying coz i didnt get new shoes,but she did.

THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE THE WEEKEND ENDS.

do the insane pile of overdued homework.
Make my revision timetable because PROMOS are effing near and i do not want to get retained,really. No seriously,i dont.
Hang up the good ol' motivation board coz thats what i do when big exams come near.
Go to the borders' book fair. (just because!)
watch the latest episodes of Partner.
say the pledge at 8:22. (nah,not really. maybe ill say it at 8:45.)

THINGS I DONT WANT TO,BUT HAVE TO DO BEFORE THE WEEKEND ENDS.

do the insane pile of overdued homework.
clean the room T_T
go to the cemetery on monday morning (because it's emotionally draining to visit grandparents you wished you were closer and nicer to when you were younger coz the only way you can be nice to them now is through putting flowers on their graves DDD: & its scary to realise that one day,you'll be underground too.)
WR & EOM. (all these acronyms are freaking IVLE.)
clean the room T_T coz i'll mess it up again after cleaning it.
part with the long weekend and wake up to the cold tuesday morning that spells 'wellness'

connie's tag.

2009-08-05T20:55:00.002+08:00

Connie's tag reminds me to publish yet another one of my rare but insanely weird and bizzare dreams that i remember.

in this one,i meet a guy in a room with a few normal looking people around. He's topless but not really coz he's covered with ink. (LIKE MICHAEL SCOFIELD) but not really like michael coz he's not TOTALLY FILLED with tattoos. get what i mean? yeah. then suddenly he appears in front of me and turns his back towards me and i swear, i saw our msn conversation tattooed on his backI only saw "suuuuuu says : ______" and then "hajsfhjaskfgjds says :_____" and my taecyeon display picture tattooed too. but not what the convo was about.Weird,but still, IF THATS NOT COOL,NOTHING IS!

Funfestique is happening and i cant be more proud of ATLAS! :D
seriously dude,we kinda rock.

but my body is aching and im going to watch PARTNER NOW.
msn convos <3
i need to reward myself with starbucks,pronto.

BUT WAIT! NO I CANT.
im living on my lunchbox D:

BOTY.

2009-08-02T01:22:00.002+08:00

Went for BOTY ASIA today at D'marquee. i missed watching some bboying action! (L40 days were the shitzx) watching battles live never cease to amaze me. hot bboys,hot moves,so damn flexible and adrenaline-almost visible in the air. now thats enjoyment. Although, the event lacked in some ways (CHYEAH! -.-) ,im pretty happy that i got a tcket for half price instead of paying $37. ( THANK YOU NARI & HER FREE TICKETS! :D) oh! all areas crew from japan took the gold! theyre effing amazing! (i do not kid.) Then we went to pastamania where i underestimated the 'chilli' sign on the menu and ordered the most spiciest no-sauce pasta,ever. D:

On the way home on 39,i fell in love with Dynamic Duo for the 839389138 time and listened to 'Good love' (feat Kim Bum Soo) on repeat because i swear,its the sexiest song ever made.

GAEKO,YOUR BEATS SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF MY TORTURED SOUL.
kay,i dont really have a tortured soul.
Somebody on youtube commented that this was the best baby-making song ever he/she has ever heard.
I can see why.PAHAHAAHAHA. but seriously,freaking sexy!
Gaeko and Choija are freaking geniuses!Dynamic Duo is the shit.

When we go to korea next year ( AND WE WILL! IM EFFING DETERMINED ) im going to go to a dynamic duo gig,even if it means stowing away in a crate full of uhm....apples? yes. whatever it takes! I also want to shop till my wallet gives way and go to some underground hip hop clubs and go to the 63 building and the yg building and 2NE1's big ass apartment. just because.

true red.

2009-07-25T23:03:00.003+08:00

Went to go watch the ndp preview show with ruohan today coz shubaa got extra tickets.Its the first time since primary 5,that i went to see ndp live (sorta) so it was fun.You know,normally ill be the biggest cynic when i watch ndp on tv (ill say things like : i bet the president really just wants to go home) but live i just gawk in awe at how amazing everything looks.If ndp's aim was to make people gawk in awe and say 'zomg,singapore damn cool ah' then im testiment to its sucess.HAHA.I think im past the phase where i act like the biggest cynic,criticizing my own country because i think its cool eventhough deep inside i know that if im not here,life would suck (more than it does now)

OMG.i've matured.
puhahahahahahaha!

Anyways,im doing a meme because afrah tagged me on her blog and it seemed fun and im not lazy.(and coz i have matured,ironically.)
why did she have to give me such random,insane words.

fyi,it goes like this :afrah tags me and gives me 5 words that reminded her of me and i have to uhh..explain them.

BIGBANG:
the occupants of my heart since uhmm..2007?lol. i love bigbang coz theyre undeniably talented and they have great songs and great concerts. I miss them and want them to come back and release some good old ghetto stuff like 'goodbye baby' & because of them ive also met a real good bunch of friends,whom i love too.BBSG OLDIES FTW.
yeah,i used to think im going to get married to daesung.But since ive matured,now i think 'we're not going to get married,WE'RE FREAKING ELOPING B-TCHES!'
harharhar.

Doraemon:
Uhh,big japanese robocat who has a magic pocket? he is also cute and i love to splurge on useless fake-doraemon merchandise in pasar malams.
for example :Doraemon pouch,doraemon ez-link holder and uhm,Doraemon shower cap.
btw,my doraemon wallet is disintegrating.I swear,its eating up all my money.

Christopher Boone:
I hate him and think that he's the worst fictional character made.In my mind,he looks like Daniel Racliffe meets Napoleon Dynamite. (yes,with the eyebrows too) and no matter what syafiqah says Curious incident of the dog in the night time -- is my enemy.

Drama:
hmm..idk.I guess i used to love it more before than now.Im kinda tired of acting(lol,please take this at face-value.nothng more.i swear) Nonetheless,mj drama is filled with hilarious people and drama sessions are always fun.Visage was fun too. I swear,Della haunts me till today.

Guppies:
small fishes that uhh dont really matter to me because i am not a fish-person.Unless its uhm,fried or steamed or asam pedas. (srsly afrah,i have no idea where you get these words from)

so yes.ive done that. im not going to tag anybody coz thats how i rolll.(HAHAHA.okay no,if you want a meme just uhh... tag and say you do. ill think of some words)

NO MOTIVATION TO DO EOM (1ST DRAFT. X_X)
KILL ME NAO.

thirty-nine.

2009-07-24T22:48:00.005+08:00

phowar.what a week!

School's been as hectic as ever and every morning i try harder than ever to find something not right to make as an excuse for sleeping in.Maybe im just becoming too healthy or im getting bad at exaggerating body aches or head aches to make them seem like good reasons for not going to school.But alas,i drag my fat ass on the 39 bus every morning. (whether i get a nag session in the car on the way to the bus stop doesnt matter.that,im immune to) Its been a while since i was this silent in my house anyways.Mouth shut,speakers playing Mong's new album or Epik High Remixing the human soul.Ironically,listening to them,alone in the room is like having a conversation with the ones closest to the heart..I like it this way.

Whats new. uhhh. Watched Harry Potter with Khai today after maths remedial (Yes,i need to go for maths remedial T_T) Maybe coz i didnt re-read the book and details have left my brain...but i like it.I get why people dont like it so much coz there wasnt any 'EPIC!' moment in the movie.(I mean,after all that trouble and your telling me the horcrux was fake?!) yeah,i appreciate Draco Malfoy though.He is incredibly tall,lanky,blonde and extremely sexy.& you've got to love RON;its a crime if you dont,really. (but ugh,me and khai just wanted to choke that lavender to death during the movie.SHEISUGLY.HERMIONEISPRETTY.) ahhh,harry potter.you gotta love the pre-teen days! (HARHARHAR.)

its frustrating to think that this pastime is becoming way to widespread and its not about what really matters anymore.
it feels like a freaking rat race with fangirl pride at stake.
DAMMNIT,JUST LET ME LIKE WHO THE HELL I WANT.

give me the light.

2009-07-19T22:06:00.004+08:00

SOMEDAY,
i want people to google me because they think im the lyrical genius of their souls or the heroine of their hearts.(they can wiki- me too.doesnt matter.HAHA)
i want to go to starbucks and when its my turn to order,the person says, 'The Usual?"
i want to be able to wander the world,go and come back with no strings attached.
i want to sleep so long,when i wake up i can say ' that was a nice sleep. i dont feel like sleeping for another 5 more mins'
i want to actually do my homework.(on time)
i want to have a huge ass wardrobe for my shoes,so i can walk in and drown in euphoria.
i want to own a daiso. or a tesco. (whatever works.)

oh man. tomorrow's monday again.
T_T

A ∩ B, or nothing at all.

2009-07-16T21:53:00.007+08:00

i found my article for EOM in 2 mins. (i typed 'article ivory coast child labour' on google.HAHAHA.Rebecca Bloomwood is my hero.) I havent got around to do it yet though,i will. eventually (right?)

so mye results are out in its distorted but true-est form.i dont know what to define as 'bad' or 'unacceptable' anymore.I know i didnt study for most of the subjects. So im gonna just classify everything as 'underpar' for that.if i say im going to work hard now,will i actually? I dont know yet.
So i wont say it.

ive been on random rampant Movement Crew high.Its amazing how many talented people can conjugate to make amazing-ness.i love Gaecko,officially.Dynamic Duo is the shit.I've been youtube-ing the other members and i really like Dok2 and TBNY.
dont ask me why i like korean hip-hop coz most of the time i dont understand the raps without looking at translations.I told you its a rampant high.(Try asking a druggie why he takes drugs?)
its the addictive flows and insane beats,its the sparse english verses that fill me up with bright,bright enlightenment & when i DO look at the translations,im constantly blown away at the wordplay,the rhymes and how these verses reach the depths of my soul so easily.(even if its just dissing.)

The Movement 4.
Tiger JK is beyond sexy and TABLO IS THE SHIT.
Gaecko <3!

You know,its stupefying why the world needs to be categorized all the time and if your into A you cannot be into B.
Eventhough theyre under the same universal sample.
ZZZZZ.

top of the world.

2009-07-11T18:09:00.004+08:00

I always gawk in awe when i hear people on tv or on korean variety shows talk about how they experienced something that drived them to work so hard to achieve their dreams and get where they are now.

"After being in the accident and miraculously surviving,i realised the true value of life.After that moment,i worked relentlessly to become an accomplished actor...I realised life wasnt worth wasting and since im living,i'd want to grab my dreams whilst i still could.& here i am."
or
"After going to Africa to see the plight of the children there,the teenagers there,i couldnt believe the amount of luxury i've been living in whilst they didnt even have access to clean water.And yet we lived on the same planet!!From then i decided not to just waste my live away and 'follow the flow' like i always did. i studied hard,worked hard to make my life on earth worthwhile whilse it lasted...&here i am."
or
"Seeing my grandmother bring me up with such passion and hard work after my parents passed on,drived me to work hard,if not for me,for her.I wanted all my grandmother's hard work and sacrifice from bringing up to be worthwhile...& here i am."
or
'im forever grateful to that moment.if not for it, i wouldnt be here now.."

I wonder if its the same for everybody.Do we all have to experience a life-changing moment to motivate us to work continuously hard to achieve our 'dreams'?If we do,then what about those who just live life passively and dont meet this 'moment'? Do we just accept and live in mediocrity,without a 'drive',semi-knowing that we will die without achieving our highest hopes and dreams?

honestly,i dont know.(but here i am secretly hoping that if it's true,i meet this 'moment' real soon)
Because we all want motivation at times where the tutorials pile up to your nose.
so here's hoping,for those of us who hasnt yet met our moments,
WE'LL MEET THEM BEFORE PROMOS.

the depths of my fangirl-ing heart.

2009-07-06T15:39:00.003+08:00

If saving energy was this yummy,the earth wont be ailing like it is now.
& i officially stamp my seal on 0:18-0:25. (imnotsharing.)
hahahaha @jay-taec height difference.(그래도,리드자 사랑해!)

I WANT TO GO TO THE LIBRARY AND READ FLUTTERY BOOKS.
NAOW.
damn,i miss rachel hawthorne's fluttery books.theyre fun to read and not depressing.
unlike bronte.tsktsksk.

친구였잖아..

2009-07-04T18:45:00.004+08:00

Yesterday,i met up with bbsg oldies for an overdued stress-relieving rave.HAHAHA. okay,it wasnt a rave. but we did dance.or at least i tried to! (eh,i tried my best!) Miroo's sister had a kpopdance-night for her project as part of school.(tell me why poly projects sound so fun but jc projects screw with your brain so much you hate them?) Then we ate this big-ass korean bento.
i love bbsg outings coz i spazz freely and people actually join in the spazz instead of going 'o_o'
& phft.i dont care how,but i must land my ass in korea next year.
Maybe ill get scouted by yg.HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
or JYP. PAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Ze laptop is going through servicing and here i am praying that my files will be saved. esp my music files. if they are gone,i will cry.badly.like a child or like jokwon on his debut day.
(iloveyou,kwon!you make me happy.)

This makes me happier though.

its easily my daily drug.i love the song,love the MV. i think youngbae freaking PWNS this! i used to think bong was the one with most stage prescence but im changing votes to youngbae.why? JUST LOOK AT HIM.oozing with charisma and those slick dance moves.oh yes! the choreo is great.SHAUN EVARISTO,YOU PWN.

im going to tesco later.zomg,i am such a tesco junkie.im not even kidding.
i swear,nobody can love a hypermart more than me.

너 꿈이 뭐야?

2009-06-30T23:43:00.003+08:00

isnt it interesting there are some dreams you'll just remember for a long time?Ironically,the dreams that you want to remember you dont,instead you only remember the ones that are absolutely and utterly -weird.

like how i can still remember vividly i dreamt that i broke my spine because an obese caucasion woman flipped me upside down and threw me to the ground. and the worse thing is,nobody cared that i broke my spine and left me on the floor to rot for 5 days. After 5 days my mother came to get me and i asked her ''mama,why did you leave me to rot for 5 days with a broken spine??'' but she didnt say anything but merely wheeled me away in this wheelchair like thing and brought me home in a lorry.

WHAT DOES THIS ALL MEAN?!
i dont get enough love in dreams.
the R.E.M world hates me D:

the shizz;

my laptop is still in a coma.it off's without reason and i am sad and restless. 우리 아기 ㅠㅠ.
Im done with LOA,i dont even know why i was on LOA since indon only has 2 known cases.but who cares since its mitigation stage now and it doesnt matter where you go.
ITS FREAKING EVERYWHERE,KIDS!
Lit is left on the mye list and i dont deserve to be relieved coz i didnt study enough to feel any relief.
school is a scary place now. the meridian paranoia fills the already stiffling pasir ris air.
dae solo minialbum this year baby!
i have a very scary urge to follow papa to bangkok this long weekend.
my need for new sneakers is so high right now,i could make up the demand for the entire sneaker market.
jo kwon is love. and i want to devote a shrine to him. it will be named 'the hall of holy-cow-how-can-someone-be-so-hot-and-manly-but-so-girly-at-the-same-time'

billie jean is not his lover,okay!
& the boy is freaking not his son,so stop bothering the poor man.

my emoticon life sucks.

2009-06-16T02:41:00.005+08:00

at this moment i feel..

D: at my youtube to mp3 converter which is not working
T_T at the newly released Taecyeon mnet scandal photos of taec&his fake but pretty girlfriend.
X_X when i look at the time...
Z_Z when i realise what time i need to be awake later
!@#$%^ coz i really dont like the clothes 2pm are wearing for 니가 밈다.
@_@ at taecyeon's super shiny leather pants and very cheap-looking pasar malam shades.
:] because im finally going on a holiday after so long
(no,actually i feel :DDD because im going on a holiday after so long.)
^_^ because ill get to go sneaker shopping and get myself some well deserved dunks.(hellyeah!)
:D/D: for all the good/yummy but bad for wellness indo food that ill get to eat.
B) at all the new apps i have on my itouch
o_o at how im gonna complete revising when i come back.
TTT_TTT because now ive reminded myself of the whole pile of studying i have YET to do.
*saddest emoticon you've ever seen* because i dont want to fail Mid-years.
-___-cause i realise the likeliness of impending failure.

will not update, probably till the end of the holidays because everyone knows ill have to study like a dog when i get back D:
안녕!^^

dont mind me i am fangirl.

2009-06-14T20:16:00.004+08:00

urgh. sicksicksick.

I went for the free firework's show 'Crackers' yesterday.Fyi,the FIREWORKS show was held at YISHUN. i dont know why they had it at yishun but still,GO YISHUN! (all you tamp/bedok/pasirris people beware. yishun'stimetorisemahomies!) The show was rad. half the time i was busy consoling my little brother who was scared out of his witz.
Oh speaking of him,ITS HIS BIRTHDAY TODAY! happy birthday my cute but temperamental little brother.May you not break too many hearts when you grow up.As it is,too many little girls love you already.
Ruohan & Yuding aka the two people who co-live in my house crashed again yesterday.We just basically slacked,made a really unhealthy 1am meal out of fries,chicken fingers and pandan mantou,watched global warning concert again (aww,miss bigbang D:) then was too lazy to come to my room to sleep so we slept sprawled on the Lsofa and the floor of the basement like drunkards without a home.
2NE1 WON MUTIZEN ON INKI TODAY. ZOMG ZOMG ZOMG! & they've only debuted.geez! i am fricking psyched! there's also a lot of YG FAMILY love going on. I love CL. she is fierce.
i need to rant. 왜 MNET 왜왜왜?! why do you have to choose TAEC to be on mnet scandal.I was fine when khun did it because he's NOT taec. but srsly mnet,NOW you've crossed the line. & all the k-netizens are on FIRE (hahah) because of khun's make-believe girlfriend and attacking her and what not. I say let's go attack the PD's of mnet for creating such an insane show instead. 아ㅏㅏㅏㅏㅏ,우리 옥캣. ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ
okay,im kidding. im not a butthurt fangirl who wants to attack PD's or fake girlfriends.I am a peaceful fangirl who loves everybody and wishes to live on a mountain where there are ponies,unicorns,rainbows and cotton candy.
uhuh. (it's not me,its the medicine speaking.)
I love Fig 1.0 Minji is my little sister biatches.

Fig 1.0

I want to create the future.

2009-06-12T23:51:00.003+08:00

After what seemed like an eon,i met up with the bbsg oldies today! Teri gave me my Map The Soul Book Album and i got my set of new bbsg tshirts. YAY!

Map The Soul book album is beyond amazing.Tablo,Tukutz,Mithra & my sexy samurai MYK are amazing. I read 3/4 of the book on the way back from city hall.For once,i didnt succumb to motion-reading dizzyness. probably because i was too immersed in what tablo had to say.It made me think about a lot of things.Things that would ironically,give me a headache if i thought about them normally.I read the english part's of course.I cant wait to slowly read the hangul parts.The original first-hand language is always better than the translated version (even if its translated by the almighty tablo) & i really like how hangul sounds when i read it with my still foreign sounding tongue.Sounds awkward and cautious.I know in essence the meaning is the same,but maybe because of all its formalities and different forms of speech hangul sounds more imperial (?) compared to english.All asian languages do. ah,I cant wait for the day i can truly appreciate hangul in its true form without the aid of the dictionary.After reading MTS,i want Pieces of you NOW! both versions please! I officially crown tablo as god of words,Mithra as the bear of poetry and Tukutz as the turntablist of my heart.HAHAHA.

the musician and the listener
if this is love between two strangers
watching each other from afar,
that rough burning moment
when you rush in
and kiss
is-
the show.

Tablo/Mapthesoul.

Hear me when i say that i will not die before going to a bigass Epik High or The Movement concert and feel all this creative magic live with my very own eyes and ears.
all those with me,HANDS UP!
(syifa,i know you are here.HAHAHA.)

ZA,NARI,NESSA,JONGX,TALLFRIEND&JOJO are going to korea today! zomg,so excited for them.here's hoping they'll get to see 2pm and jay's abs and actually how tall taec is. oh!and also for them to at least catch a glimpse of the ever-elusive,japan-debuting BigBang.*crosses fingers*

dont.care.next.year.after.A'levels.MUST.GO!

the so-called 'proper update'

2009-06-11T01:16:00.006+08:00

PREUNIVERSITYSEMINAR.
Fun people,Fun Lepaking,Fun Prisonbreak-ing.Not so fun presentations because half the time i had the biggest urge to give in to sleep and because i am officially allergic to LT25.(really) But all in all,i made really nice friends and had a blast staying alone for 5 days.(when you live in a house with 7 people,alone is good.) Am really proud of MJ'S Multimedia team.you guys are awesome and rad and ily!I also realise that i should really learn the difference between whats happening in my HEAD and whats happening in reality. (shakespeare dude,i am sorry for scaring the shirtshit out of you early in the morning T_T)

i love SG 17 & our lovable SLO'S!
BAAAAAAAIK.

POST PREUSEM.
DRAMA-RELAPSE.okay,before you think im kidding again.IM NOT. im falling back into my watching dramas/movies nonstop stage! I havent done this since i started JC. T_T I guess the 5 months in jc didnt serve as an effective rehab then i would have hoped it'd be. T_T. so far,in 3 days ive watched

Naked Kitchen -joojihoon is yummy. he's a druggie but that doesnt eradicate the yummy factor. Weird storyline but nice for the eyes. cinematics were pleasant.
How to Keep my love - old school kmovie! cute & funny.
A random episode of Soulmate - funlikecrack!
&&&& THE ENTIRE SERIES OF MEI-CHAN'S BUTLER.(THATS 10 EPISODES IN 2 DAYS)

Mei-chan's butler is best!okay,not the best ive watched but definitely somewhere up there.Jap Dramas never dissappoint.i love how its funny and wacky with a weird but funny jap touch.Mei's classmates are freaking on crack.lol.i love them.especially Miruku-chan coz she's a jeaaanius!

But mostly,i love

Mizushima Hiro.
GIGGLES.GIGGLES.SPAZZ.DIES.
hesoprettaye! WHY ARE JAPANESE BOYS SO PRETTY?! WWWHY?!
(ps,he looks familiar coz he was Nanba senpai from Hana Kimi and the human one in Zettai Kareshi ^^)

POSTDRAMARELAPSE.
STUDY LIKE EINSTEIN ON CRACK.MUST!
coz if i dont study now,i wont have time when i get back from indo.then ill phail mye's! NOOO! T_T
in case you dont know,im going indo next week to shop like im Isla Fisher on crack.

HAH.crack is IN brothaaaa~!

also,ive decided that whenever (& they will) 2pm decides to have a concert in Thailand; I AM FREAKING THERE. coz 1) plane rides cost cheapshit now. and 2) i miss moshing with thai people and 3) imgonnameettaecandwegonnafallinloveandgetmarried :D

now you think i really am on crack eh?

아우...자쯩이나!

2009-06-08T16:11:00.003+08:00

LAZY TO UPDATE PROPERLY.WILL DO THAT LATER.

for now,I am effing annoyed.i dont really know EXACTLY why im annoyed.I think its a combination of a few factors of annoyance -fromthesamesource- that have been building up for the past 3 years.(HAH.FACTORS)but seriously,the most annoying thing is 1) it was ME that led this annoyance to start.ME! and my intrinsic need to verbal diarrhoea all the time. KARMA SUCKS. & 2) there is no possible way for the annoyance to subside because its now beyond my control.so the annoyance will just keep increasing and increasing until it finds some other thing to love.

WHHHHYYYYYY DDDD:
GAAAAAAAH.

this is childish and i dont know why im acting or feeling this way,but GAAAH! so annoying.
cant fucking help it.

a short-ass post.

2009-05-30T18:34:00.004+08:00

imlazysoimgoingtolist(again)

Top girls was uninspiring and long.Im hoping it's one of those plays which is good to read and study but horrible to watch. coz if it isnt im dead for women in lit next year.
The semester is technically over.this means only 3 semesters left in jc.zomg.REALLY?
I havent packed for pre u sem or studied for GP or did anything productive since i woke up today.
Yesterday's handover was like high on marijuana or something;ATLAS HC FTW.7TH HC FTWWW!
i wanna marry taecyeon. can i?
Today is David aka Ranice's birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY RANICE! may you know when to fart and when to not. (still love you though!hahahahaha)
need new shoes! damnit.
I cannot wait for indo.yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.
i need to clean ze room. it doesnt look like one right now.
1010101010101010101010. *

*-i just like listing numbers.
1,5,9837,20384. see?
khai understands.

fridays.

a long-ass post.

2009-05-27T21:34:00.005+08:00

you knew it was coming.i havent been able to update decently because of the continuous chain of events that came as fast as they went.

VISAGE.
It was thrilling,everything was.Being locked up in the incredibly hot and stuffy backstage for about 3 hrs in total was thrilling,being able to make people laugh was thrilling,watching other awesome friends act their heart out was thrilling,anticipating responses from the people who watched was thrilling,getting hugs from everyone after the show was thrilling,the ride back was thrilling heck even carrying the props back and fro was effing thrilling.Visage,mjdrama's maiden drama night was a success in any standards.well,at least i thought it was.I had fun 'rehearsing' with Naeem and Mr Low and had fun playing the role ELIZABETH. (not dellazxzx.) Visage's kinda making me rethink about dropping.but iono lah,being a procastinator,ill decide LATER. I also am damn proud of the whole lady audley cast coz they did amazing esp TAMANNA,because she is awesome.
& special mention to naeem who always looks so interested when im verbal diorhhea-ing during rehearsals and affirming me we will do great all the time and for helping me make acting infront of a whole lot of people enjoyable.*DOES A NAEEM SCREAM* oh! to the awesome people who came down to watch,thankyouverykamsa for the ♥ and support! you guys pwn.

mj-vj(alamak.lambat lah.PUAHAHAHAHAHA)
Normally i dont talk about this in my blog but geez these soccer matches gets me so worked up.the thing is i have no idea WHY.i think its the 'meridian might' HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. okay,a few months from now ill probably try to act cool and deny that i said any of this but for now ill say what i want.Like Khai said,the match was enjoyable to say the least.& i said before,soccer matches are practically anger therapy coz you direct all the negative energy,for 90 minutes,at the same,common enemy.But above any of that,i think admiration and respect is prominent when you watch these games.(idontknow if 'respect' is the correct word,but somesort of it i think?) I mean,i have no shizzing idea who these soccer dudes are as people or how theyre like but when theyre playing on the feel its just,woah these dudes are effing cool.Its like we all know the enormous amount of pressure(trust me,you could SMELL the pressure) involved but when theyre playing they're so cool and collected.(if it was me,i would have hyperventilated,cried,died or something as severe as that la) srsly! its almost like i want to go all gangstaaa~ and go all 'dude-you-ma-homie-and-i-respect-you-brotha!' on them.but of course i wont.As it is,half the world finds me freaky ._.

COLOSSEUM
made the mascot and the scooter and some other stuff with cons & phonsus.I kinda missed the whole council-A&P-ish things so doing it again felt like home.but it was way challenging since i forgot how difficult it really is.But it was worth it because our mascot is BOMBZX & so is our scoooter.hc is tough.god knows how anybody can 'rah-rah' a crowd. but still,i think we'll get better coz i have faith in the 7TH (: & Atlas won first for Caesar's Challenge :DDD & third for overall and cheerleading (which i feel way happy and proud of Syafiqah,Ranice and the rest of the cheerleads! you guys own.) my heart says 'YAAAAAAAY!'
PROMOTED TO GALLERY NEXT YEAR BAAAABY~!

just as i heave a virtual sigh of relief,other bigger,more important events are coming up.
Pre U Sem & SHIT! GP MYEs! HOWHOWHOWWWWW.

its okay! it always is!
because i am heathcliff.
not.

told ya it'd be a long-ass post.

OH YAH. OFF-DAY TOMORROW BAAAAABY : DDD iloveyouoffdays!

&to make this even more long-ass;

Won Bin is yummy-EST.

there aint no sunshine. BECAUSE ITS AT NIGHT. duhhh.

2009-05-24T00:09:00.006+08:00

HAHAHAHAHA,okay i just made myself laugh. but kris's 'aint no sunshine' is rad.i love it.

i am BEAT.the week has been really exhausting,and its not even ended yet! Sometimes i wonder (with me being so tired and shizz); 'is this my limit? is this my socially optimal equilibrium?'
Because,although i am physically and mentally tired,i WANT to do more things,complete more tasks,do things better than what i am doing now.but time,the fraility of the human body & the human mind just doesnt allow me to.

so i just fall asleep.

with all this exhaustion,its almost a miracle im still standing,smiling. & for this i thank the heavens above i have so many things in this world that make me feel being beat-out is a mere entrance-fee to enjoy them. things like; pasar malams,family dinners,cute but useless doraemon stuff,holidays & friends who dont go all mad even after you've led them to a non-existant place that had been demolished. T_T.

& sexythings like this.

credits:bestiz

VISAGE TOMORROW.
LET'S GO! MJDRAMA!

Kris to the frickin awesome Allen.

2009-05-22T00:04:00.002+08:00

American Idol season 8 has ended.And although i have not been entirely loyal(i did watch all the Kris performances though.because he pwns) the entire season,i basically think;

KRIS IS WIN.
Kara whatsherface and Paula arent really 'bestfriends'
Danny the fatty Gokey is overrated and my mom loves him too much.
Lil rounds has huge bottoms.
Adam Lambert screams too much and i am utterly afraid of him after that 'KISS' performance on the final results show. *tongues* god.
Randy dawg has PMS. coz he's just weird and bitchy sometimes.
Ryan is short. but lovable.
Paula is in denial of her true dress size because she always wears things that are two sizes too small.
TATIANA IS THE MOST ANNOYING PERSONTHING ON EARTH.
Jamar aka Danny's brahh for lifezx should have made it in the top 12.because he pwns.
Megan joy is not joyous. but her tats are shizzle for da dizzle!
Kara so made 'No Boundaries' with Lambert in mind.im not even kidding,its a conspiracy i tell you!
the metal (more like freaking scary old men in make up and platforms) band 'KISS' + Adam Lambert = nightmare.
Poor blind dude being forced to dance.
& awww,kris hugging his wife at the end of the show.awww.
i want a kris please.
can i have one?
oh yeah,to Syafiqah and the rest of the adam lambert supporting world : *GRINS*

왜 그런지 몰라.

2009-05-16T23:46:00.004+08:00

oktaecyeon♥

original pic credits:Catchyou/okcat.net.

Slow dancing in a burning room.

2009-05-15T23:45:00.004+08:00

In my opinion,you feel loneliest when your standing alone in your made up personal space in a crowded mrt listening to your ipod trying to be absorbed in your own world but your really actually perfectly aware of everybody else in the train around you.Like the couple PDA-ing the corner,the kinda hot dude two seats away,the foreign-coughs-talent speaking really loudly behind you.Nothing spells loneliness more than the sporadic,short distances between mrt stations. Maybe its just me,but its when im standing alone trying to listen to my ipod amidst all the buzz i think,' damn su,your pathetically alone.'

& then i start to make up things in my mind.Ridiculous ideas which should never be said outloud, ideas thats only for the mind to giggle at.(come on,you have these ideas too.) So,because I sometimes lose the ability to contain my thoughts and actions IN my mind,ill do something really embarrassingly stupid like ;'hit myself in the forehead' or 'giggle like a fangirl' or 'smile suddenly'.All this in a crowded mrt not realising people are actually observing me although it looks like theyre absorbed in THEIR own thoughts. and after all that, REALISATION HITS!
then i go 'ohshit fuck,did i just do that outloud?!'

T_T seriously su,you have to realise you freak people out sometimes. like now because your taking to yourself in third person in your blog.

ps! me,khai and afrah went to tampines today.friday is officially TAMPINES-FRIDAY.
(dont laugh.)
pps! Syafiqah told me that LTC's changed from Kota Tinggi to BOTTLETREEPARK.
HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
(laugh.)

content you in my discontent!

2009-05-15T00:05:00.004+08:00

just a fast one because this post isnt supposed to be here anyways. i should be a)studying maths b)sleeping c)packing my bag but alas! here i am.

Khai's blog post made me convieniently want to list too.credits for the idea: KHAIRIAH.

Adrian Pang in Much Ado is hilarious and he is a theatrical genius. (pillowman still pwns,imo.)
Shakespeare is for the effing shizzing win.I love the bald dude now.I love how he twists my mind into thinking differently with all the wordplay and all that fun shizz. & his characters are shizzing to the fizzing dizzle. (refer:Grumio.)
Ms Pearlin says we shouldnt let anybody look down on us coz we're H1 maths. but in a way,im proud to say that im h1maths because that makes me special compared to the rest of the gc-world.
I am so effing shizzing to the gizzing screwed for tomorrow's (i mean TODAY's) binomial/normal test T_T
Visage is coming SOON. phowar that was fricking fast.
Ock Taecyeon rapping in 돌라올지도 몰라 is sexysexysexy. i ♥♥♥ you taec!
when people look at you weirdly in the mrt do you smile at them? no,you dont su. they'll just think your doubly weird. -.-
Everybody is busy with GPP. but my imba group hasnt started. i still love us though :D!
17.17.17.17 MAY PLZX.
i ♥♥ this. (refer Fig 1.0)

Fig 1.0

세상에 너를 소리쳐!

2009-05-11T01:27:00.002+08:00

So today,i dragged jarratt and yuding (spontaneously!) to go all the way to Bukit Batok to hunt for Big Bang's "세상에 너를 소리쳐!" book. You east-ies thought north was ulu,you have not been to the west. it was wild alright. uhuh. T_T

& WE FOUND IT! right there on the bottom shelf of solmart's book corner. EUPHORIA! and there was a miracle 20% off. it must have known i was coming! (i even saw the kor. version of Tablo's pieces of you,but being the good spendthrift child that i am,i did not buy it) im currently going through the daesung chapters SLOWLY. this means,slowly translating the words i dont understand and figuring how the sentence is structured.& it'll probably take me forever but its okay! because by the end of it my korean vocab would expand indefinitely. & i'll be able to converse with the solmart ahjummas in FULL korean. (then i can go korea and marry daesung and/or taecyeon.kekekekekekekeke T_T)

catched up with jarratt after a long time,yj's made him a bit sharp-tongued,but it was fun anyways.

Then the entire family with some family friends went to TESCO in johor again.lol.TESCO is love lah. i love TESCO.nothing really exciting but my dad's banned from TESCO by my mama now because he spent WAY over the proposed budget.WAY OVER.WAAAY.
but im not complaining because now the fridge is full of nonsense junk food that i enjoy.
(however,the very same nonsense is 'wellness's no.1 enemy. T_T)

on a much more serious,foreshadowing,wuthering-heights-pathetic-fallacy- note,
i think there is something wrong with me.
as in,i think the systems in my body are not functioning correctly.
mama's dragging me for a checkup tomorrow and honestly,i dont feel right.(not one bit)
....
D:

ps! 2PM'S 2ND AWAAARD! MUTIZEN ON INKI!
축하해요,우리 태국 왕자,닉쿤! ♥♥♥

change is good. i welcome change.

2009-05-10T02:42:00.004+08:00

so whaddya think?
i personally love all my icons coz theyre all from the absolutely adoring NII photoshoot.
i effing love NII. & because of peer pressure,ive started the painful process of linking.So if you want to be linked,bother me until i actually do.Mind you,that's a lot of bothering.

Anyways,yesterday was really awesome because i got to go explore tampines with khairiah, visit my grandmama and play with my cousin,converse with a solmart ahjumma in semi-korean(semi because i am still not prozx T_T) whilst in orchard with yuding,go back to huamin and meet mrs lui and ms goh AND hang with ruohan,yuding & mitch after what felt like an eon.
thats a handful ehh.

but seriously,going back to huamin (even if its for awhile and we got death stares from mr raju or whatshisface for coming)was nice.For one you get to think 'shit,i am old' but thats in a good way coz it just means you've matured from colourful walls and shit-small canteen chairs. Hanging out with han,ding and mitch was way cool too.i miss them like mad.(more of ruohan and yuding,because mitch the bitch transformed into a chi-mat.lol) I love it that no matter how much our environment changes,when we hang out we're still the same retards from primary school.I love it that there are no awkward silences only comfortable pauses.

Technically,today is mother's day.kudos to all momma's.
i phail at daughter-ing because i dont have a gift for umma.
but its okay because no gift can amount to the greatness of my umma.
HAHA.pathetic excuse T_T? but still,true whether you want to believe or not.
my umma is superwoman.proof:currently,she's baking muffins to give my grandmama(s) and her friends(who are mothers) for mothers day.(when SHE'S the one whose supposed to get gifts!) she is without any compeition at all;superwoman. but her super-ness just makes me look more of a failure eh?
엄마 짱!

oh yes! 2PM GOT THEIR 1ST NUMBER 1 THIS WEEK : DDDD!
축하해요 택연아!♥♥♥

FIRE!

2009-05-07T20:56:00.005+08:00

i hate feeling under the weather.all the headaches and feeling lethargic and out of energy really sucks.the muscle aches and stomach cramps suck too. and the sneeze doesnt help either.
(i dont have a fever,so dont judge!)

I LOVE FRIDAYS BECAUSE ME AND KHAI CAN GO EXPLORE TAMPINES!

O' GRUMIO!

2009-05-05T23:30:00.022+08:00

(행복)Happiness...

(사랑)Love..

HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEEE.
no reason,just HAD to put.

the people who make life muchmuchmuch more exciting!

& the ones ill cherish till death.

sometimes pictures are better than words.
ps! i have no idea why i am doing this. god knows i have 289372894792792things to do.
2am.2pm.2seconds.HAH! T_T;

but its okay!
it always is.

stupid.stupid.pigs.

2009-05-03T00:25:00.002+08:00

appa just left for paris today and he's only coming back next sunday.I now understand that this swine flu shizz only sucks badly when someone you love is going to a place where there has been cases DD:

난 아빠가 많이 기도할까요.

ehh.WOLVERINE PLZXZXZXZXZ?

TAK BOLEH ANG'S!

2009-04-30T20:09:00.005+08:00

i think watching 'critical' mj soccer matches are extremely stress relieving.Ironically of course! since half the match your practically going nuts with anxiety.But the thing is,you get rid of all the negative energy in you and direct to the 90minute-enemy.you shout,scream,curse and you feel hecka good about it. After all that,although it pains you to be defeated T_T,you feel cleansed.(at least i did!)still,go mj!

this week has been exhausting!(THANK GOD IT IS OVER.) oh yes,on wednesday we got our positions in house comm (technically,we knew we were in on tuesday evening.) && i am really thanking god that syaf & cons got in too. because we said it'd be AWESOME if all three of us could get in. and it really is! Kay,so i didnt get publicity & connie thinks i got a free upgrade to secretary. (ehh,erase all the freaky monica-lewinsky theories in your deranged minds NOW! this means you erfi azhar and queen asyraf) Honestly,i was shocked at first (NOT UPSET,CONS.really! just shocked.) initially, i was worried itll be too big of a job but now i say 'BRING IT ON BABYYY~!'I HATH NO FEAR. oh yes! GO ATLAAAS HOUSE COMM!let's give our best-est x infinity! highlighter people pwn the worldzx!
OHOHOH! a real late congrats to the rest of us who have our ugly mugshots pasted on the house boards! (okayokay,my mugshot is actually quite okay.i dont look like a sri lankan maid,AT ALL!)

So,what being in house comm and with VISAGE coming up in 3 weeks ill be hell busy. & the weather is not fucking cooperating.Given,it's been cooler compared to last week but UNTIL SINGAPORE GIVES ME SNOW,I WILL NOT BE SATISFIED DAMN IT.

taecyeon is sexy.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY FRIEND KHAIRIAH. I HOPE YOU LIKE MY RETARDED JEMPUTAN-CARD PRESENT!
ps! ms lai says that your thermometer is your ULTIMATE WEAPON now and you MUST NOT LOSE IT.
so yeah,try provoking me
& ILL ATTACK YOU WITH MY THERMOMETER,YOU SWINE!

Daesung's birthday and im doing shizz things.

2009-04-26T23:18:00.002+08:00

미스터 강에게..
생일축하해!
앞으로도,계석 웃음하고 살아요!너의 웃음은 나의 힘이니까! ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ.

i dont even know it that^ is grammatically correct.heck,i dont even know if its spelt correctly.this is how rusty my korean is. SAD D: but anyways,i make myself laugh at my cheesy-ness when it comes to birthday messages. someone should shoot me.

full of grandmama looove! (literally)

2009-04-24T23:31:00.003+08:00

THANK GOD THIS WEEK HAS ENDED.i dont know what i would do without fridays!
(mind you,this will be a mighty long post.THOUGHTS.IN.MIND.NEED.CLEARING.)

I didnt have anything after school today so me and khai went to tampines mall to eat at food culture.khai was laughing at me when we found seats and sat down,(she does this a whole lot) & we didnt realise there were two packet of TISSUE on the seats.

Woman: These seats are taken
Me:*looks around,sees packet of tissue*
Me: oooooorh!with the TISSUE packets?!

kay,actually i didnt mean to say TISSUE PACKET so deliberately,the situation was just too retarded for meto be rational.TSKTSKTSKTSK.& i thought this only happens in the absurd stories people circulate about Singaporeans. Seriously,if you want to reserve something,at least use something that is identifiable to yourself.& if the woman thinks its appropriate that she represents herself as a TISSUE PACKET,she needs professional help,period.

Went to visit grandmama after school today coz ive not visited for awhile and i wanted to play with my ingenius little cousin(who reminds me a lot of my cute toddler-self HAH! thus,i love her most!) My grandmama feeds and spoils me too much.I could see that she was really happy just cause i was there.This makes me sad and guilty at the same time that i dont visit her as often as i could or when she comes to our house i'm too occupied with doing my own things than entertaining her DD: gah,i am phailed grandaughter and my precious grandmama deserves better than this.really T_T. (when's the last time you visited your grandparents people.)

I know this stupid shizz education system is taking a toll on us all and a lot of people been having a really rough week DD: Some rougher than others but at the end of the day,we'll just have to pick ourselves again and say NEXT WEEK WILL BE HAPPIER! and if that doesnt work,you can always go watch THIS and laugh your worries away.works everytime!
KONTRRROL!

aja aja fighting!
PS! I CLAIM 옥택연. (not kidding)

dysfunctional family potrait.

2009-04-21T22:47:00.003+08:00

these madpeople are incredible.
we fiercezxzxzx.

my eyelids really need to stop drooping in every lecture DD:
& confidence,i need you for tomorrow.
아자아자 화이팅 수!너 할 수 있어 :DDD!

again&again.

2009-04-19T03:42:00.003+08:00

TESCO! = wholesale heaven on earth. im not kidding.I swear now when i feel so sad that i feel like dying i will go to tesco at the other end of the causeway for retail therapy.I only just reached home (its 3:45 am now.) The amount of cheap things were amazingly tempting.EVEN MORE coz they sell most products by wholesale. so its like you get 100x the fun! My grandmama went on a bread spree? yes,bread.

Auntie:*whispers* the barguet is only 16cents (RM)
Grandmama: really? so cheap?
Auntie: Coz theyre closing i think...
Grandmama: *already running to bread counter*
and she came back with 3 bundles of bread.

I have a lot of things to say so im gonna list.

2PM IS BACK BAAAABY~! again & again is an amazing song and the MV is much loved.Kim Junsu turned 19328301 x hotter.
I realised i didnt really talk about the 'RELIVE THE GWT' event; IT WAS FAWESOME. i miss my fangirls like maaaaad and mass spazzing sessions are always amazing!
oh!me,TAMANNA and DANIAL donated blood at school yesterday.It was rad,even more so coz they didnt reject me this time! >.<
My new male name is Hugh Rhys Meyers,Asyraf's most-updated girl name is Gwyneth. Syafiqah is Jake Heathcliff,Connie is Cornelius and Erfi is Trezelle Samantha Who. :D
MY OKTAECYEON IS FIERCEE!
Next week is house comm elections :/ (ahh,shizz it. ill just try my best!)
My itouch finally gave in to backlight-madness.Its all daark now and i cant see anything although i can hear songs. GEEZ DD:
wolverine is sexy,but im sure you people realised that by now.
KRIS ALLEN WAS FTW ON AI THIS WEEK & Randy's just being a 'dog' with all his 'pitch problem' comments. X_X. & can you people imagine hearing Adam's screaming on commercial radio? eww.
NEED.TO.CUT.HAIR.PERIOD!

my mind is STILL in a mess,and i have a feeling it wont be neater anytime soon.it's the constant and vicious flow of thoughts that flood my brain and refuse to be discarded.its okay though,despite my mind being in a shitty mess, I AM HAPPY DAMNIT.
왜 그런지 몰라~

oh yes. 나는 한국말 공부할 필요해 ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ.

HOMYGOD.

2009-04-13T13:31:00.002+08:00

& i come online to find this.

HUGH NO.1 ON A KOREAN VARIETY SHOW WITH OLD BUT CUTE SINGLE LADIES.
WTF.
but still,he is love.

pretension.obsession.for physical possesion.

2009-04-11T22:27:00.009+08:00

I felt like i was at my wits end a few hours ago.
you know when you feel so saturated you cant think properly but you do things anyways because you cant stop being in motion. the thing is whatever you do,it all goes wrong coz your not thinking. then you feel like crying coz everything's not going your way? then your chest feels heavy and your airway's getting narrower by the minute. not long after your shoulders ache because it feels like the invisible burden on your shoulders suddenly solidifies into rock-heavy weight. Then you throw a tantrum and expect everyone around you to tolerate it.
yeah.its the worse set of emotions to feel ever.
panic-anger-hopelessness-panic-anger-hopelessness.
& at the end of it all,you just feel TIRED.

but im fine now. Because of a short trip to the dry cleaners with Shubaa and a Slurpee(okay,it wasnt slurpee,it was sugar liquid which hadnt solidified) and listening to Epik High's Free Music on the way home.It's currently my favourite song.MYK and Tablo are genuises.
i do not kid.

The rap game is all show and lyrical descension
Pretension, obsession for physical possession
I'll pay for your CD but pay no attention
Ascension, I'll never lie to get it
Fake people piss me off like diuretic

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WORDPLAY = WORLD.

listen and be amazed.(its in english so you have no excuse : D!)
Tablo & MYK -Free Music

Bugger.

2009-04-11T02:36:00.004+08:00

Daaarn,this Hugh-high is uncontrollable.i watched Notting Hill after half a decade of procastinating.Hugh Grant makes me so happy,you would think im delirious.Eventhough he had his 1999 hairstyle,him in Notting Hill is amazing.Hugh Grant-humour is the best(EST!).So amazingly witty and charming.and ive added 'find someone with hugh grant-esque humour and elope' to my to do before i die-list.

gaah.im getting real worried for NMA now. DDD:
daaaarn.T_T.

Hughs.

2009-04-09T22:36:00.007+08:00

So.Today i realised that all the Hugh's that i know of are amazingly sexy.

Hugh Jackman,Hugh Grant,Hugh Dancy & Hugh Laurie.

Syafiqah's right though,Hugh is such a 'wtf?!' name.
HUGH.HUGH.HUGH.HUGH.
damn,now i feel like watching Austrailia,Love Actually,Ella Enchanted/Shopaholic and House at the same time.

Thank god for good friday!i swear,im up to my ends just to get things done.aja aja hwaiting suuu!
on a less significant note;i got to eat Popeye's today!
yay for cheek'n.

wants vs should's

2009-04-04T20:32:00.003+08:00

i feel like listing.listing is theraupatic.Christoper Boone says so!

I have 0 motivation to even open Wuthering Heights or Taming of the Shrew right now.
Isnt it funny that i think Lit is the most fun and interesting subject but lit assignments are the ones i detest the most? X_X.
I watched The Legend of Chun-Li on the web today and fell asleep half way through. chun-li doesnt even look azn la.tsktsktsk.
KHAIRIAH and me went to watch Confessions of a shopaholic yesterday @ YISHUN during our break before pre u sem/band and went back to PASIR RIS after watching. we are crazy. but you like us anyways.PUAHAHAHAHAHA.
Hugh Dancy who plays Luke Brandon in Shopaholic is hot. i like him.
2pm's idol show season ended.SO SAD T__T.
OH! i came late on friday and got my ezlink scanned. imma juvie!
The realization of the need to work doubly hard hasnt hit me yet.I wish it'd hit me now rather than hitting me on the face 2 weeks before mid-years. :/
RELIVE THE GWT! :DDD!
I really need a haircut but my mom keeps on saying my hair's too short to do anything & no matter how many times i say "MAMA,its not the length,its the QUANTITY!" she does not budge!

My mind is in an absoulte clutter.I can literally see my thoughts floating around my brain in bubble-speeches. i wish i could put some of the more irritating ones like 'DO YOUR PI' and 'READ LIT TEXTS' and 'GO BATHE!' into a box,seal them up and put them away on one corner in my brain and leave only the nice ones like 'GO DOWN AND EAT' and 'WATCH UNDERWORLD AGAIN LATER' and 'SLEEP'. that would be great.
__________________________________________________

but too bad god invented this thing called a conscience and mine is telling me that running away from things you dont want to do does not mean they go away su.

credits:theygsecret,ela@YGS21
LOLLIPOP IS FRCKING ADDICTIVE-LOVE!
top is yummy-est!

time management.

2009-04-02T22:01:00.002+08:00

grr.just a quick one because im waiting for my downloads to finish in 9 mins.
Clearly the time management slides for chrystal today didnt affect me coz i havent even started econs yet -.-

APRIL FOOLS YESTERDAY WAS EPIC PHAIL. me and connie tried to do hidden camera by pretending that we were fighting and gossiping about each other to the others but PAAAHH! everytime we tried to fight verbally we'd giggle like loons.PHAIL!PHAIL!PHAIL! its okay! NEXT YEAR WATCH OUT KAAAY. but nizam believed us! YAY!

Yesterday was also house nomination day,and i eventually did try for house comm after weeks of being on the fence about it.I wanted to but didnt know if i can or am up to it but I guess i kinda realised i really want to do something fufilling in jc so i can, not say i spent 2 years merely mugging and since i love atlas and i like house-events,why not eh?ive got nothing to lose so why not try.At the very least i can say 'i tried?' so yeah,im just going to see how things goes and if i get it,why not & if i dont,i tried :) I feel happy that all 3 of us syaf the social butterfly and connie the loony(HAHAH.I MADE THAT UP) and me are attached to liming! yaaaaay!

Today was tiring as hell because i kept dozing of in everything.and thursdays are unbearably long! and erfi,ranice was sick and went home and nizam didnt come so it was like wuthering heights in school laaa.

AND WHO ELSE IS IN LOVE WITH KRIS IN AI?!
OH BTW!
HTTP://BIGBANGSINGAPORE.COM
:))

my little brother loves the earth too.

2009-03-28T23:05:00.010+08:00

Today i persuaded the entire family to go out for dinner so that our house can be in total darkness for the cause of earth hour.(Thank god for the hippy-sylvia's sms,if not i would have forgotten) We went to Causeway and i was in the middle of eating my really nice sabba(?) fish when the lights at banquet went off. At first i thought "What an apt day to have a blackout" but then i realised "Ohhh,theyre doing earth hour too." but 10 mins later the lights went on again. TSKTSK. they do realise its earth HOUR,not earth 10 MINS right? Although,i do believe that earth hour serves the purpose of conserving way better than LIVE:EARTH did. Given,at a household basis an hour of darkness doesnt really change much but with the participation of buildings in the city areas all around the world,i think it's really awesome! all that sudden reduction in light pollution!If only earth hour was longer,than maybe us city dwellers can have the opportunity of seeing the 'real' sky longer! id give a lot if i we could go to CBD and see millions of stars just like that.Although some people might say earth hour doesnt really help,but i think its been really amazing at making people more earth-aware. My little siblings surprised me today when they talked so passionately about earth hour and making sure we had ALL the electrical switches off before we went out.and my youngest brother is only 8! awwh,i am now a proud geogy sister.

Yesterday was speech day,and aside from all the bloated,retarded,wannabe-mafia teachers that i loathe in the school,i think the speech day was kinda well-run. Especially the parade part coz it was really elaborate! (GO ET AND MS PAY! LOL) Shubaa is amazing for mentioning me and ruohan in her speech. (ALL HAIL SHUBAA! PLZ DONT BE SO SAD IN AJ,YOU STILL HAVE USSS :D) I also had fun with the old retards as usual. We had our ritual of going around taking pictures with everyone after a school event ended. me and ruohan were the first ones to get to the reception area so we could grap our unagi sushi. we pwn everybody : D! oh,we saw ms loh chin ee too! wahh, she's like my second life-hero so it was really nice meeting her!

With the almighty,mr Emmanuel Teo.
darn,i miss his english lessons and him hitting my head with paper everytime i said something stupid D:

*I AM STILL ANGRY AT RUOHAN FOR MAKING THIS BLUR.*
go derrick! *giggles like mad*

This is forever ♥♥♥!

mapping the soul.

2009-03-25T19:39:00.003+08:00

Wednesdays are good days.There arent any tutorials,only lectures and school ends at 1:45 and i get to go home straightaway. ^^

Ive been watching a lot of Family Outing/2PM videos/movies online these days.I know i shouldnt coz school's going on and my tutorials are piling up once again(not that i completed the batch before -.-) I watched Austrailia again today,i know i shouldnt have but Hugh Jackman eradicates all the little self-discipline i have in me.(Antique is still begging for me to watch it as it lays stagnant in my downloads file)

there's also been an influx in kpop at school.Either that or there a lot of kpop fans ive yet to know till recently.This is because me and connie have inflicted the 'sorry sorry' virus to A302. we do it all the time. its addictive and when we do the dance it comes across like an indian-bangra(?) dance. good fun! its always nice to know there's someone who knows suju or wondergirls in literature lectures. HAHAHA. Ive not met a lot of vips yet,with the exception of mimi from khai's class.
speaking of vips,i miss bbsg x infinity. the forum has been offline for too long. ive not spoken to syifa in aaages! SYIFA WHERE ARE YOOOU~?

Speech day is on friday so ill have to go back to yt again.I went for the rehearsal and is it just me or is everytime i come back yt seems less and less cooler.i wonder why...
i did have a good time laughing with the old retards. I AM LEOPARD,RAWR.(T_T)
Me and khai asked the really lovable fasihah(lol) to buy us both stardates coz we are dying without them in mj.i swear,i live by stardates. damn,i have to borrow someone's court shoes coz i threw away mine.

ON TO OTHER THINGS THAT WILL ALSO MAKE ME SPAZZ AND NOT STUDY;
YG's girl group is debuting soon! 앗싸! You have no idea how long ive been waiting for Park Bom to debut.2pm's coming out with their new single in april too. this makes me too happy.too happy,so happy that i can cry.i swear. (scared of me now? yeap you should be. i am fangirlzxzxzx.) AND KWON JIYONG'S SOLO ALBUM BABBBY!

PS!Epik high are gods.I think its genius theyre releasing a book-album.(even more genius coz its in english.)Tablo's blog entries are insanely funny.i swear,ill make a tablo shrine in my room.Oh yes,MYK is my new found sexy samurai boy. go see! http://mapthesoul.com

'Sometimes my body loses it’s appetite.. and my mind is starving' (MYK'S BLOG ENTRY)
^ I WISH THIS HAPPENS TO ME MORE OFTEN.
but how can I when my mama feeds me a full western plate at 9:00 pm at night.(i am currently eating a whole plate of fats made with love)
HOWHOWHOW?!

so yi jung!

2009-03-18T15:40:00.005+08:00

GAAAAAAAH.
I swear,Kim Bum is the definition of sexy right now.
seriously!

it is okay to whine and watch movies all day when your sick.

2009-03-17T21:13:00.004+08:00

urgh.as i type this,i am still feeling a little nauseous from all the meds ive been taking.Taking pills are probably number 2 on my hate list.(Number 1 is homophobes,go figure.) I have a really annoying sorethroat with this even more annoying asthma-wheezing shit.
go ahead say it ; sicccccck childddddddddd.

Anyways,the trip to Port Dickson was okay.same old i guess.We went with the entire dad's company.Company-trip? Yeah,so my dad's colleagues or at least the one that i know are pretty funny people.I cant deny that my appa is kind of a good boss.Not that i ever want to work for him,but when he addresses everybody during the dinner i felt he gave off that good boss-vibe. the boss who actually knows what he's doing,and even if he doesnt he makes his employees believe that he knows what he's doing.yaknow?Aside from this,i was really looking to eat my ass off since company trips means you can eat as much as you want coz the company pays for it.But darn,it must have been my expectations because i got sick the night we came and i couldnt even enjoy my seafood dinner that much.this saddens me. TT_TT that poor sambal fried fish was calling out to me but i could only stare at it sadly.(it was too spicy la.and you know what spicy things do to a sorethroat?)
& on the second day we went to the beach at the resort and got hooked on jumpshots.HAHAHAHA. even appa and mama tried it. they were epic PHAILURES.i swear! But still,not a lot of parents are willing to do jumpshots.
so i guess you can say my parents are kinda hip?
HAHAHAHAHA. I JUST SAID THAT MY PARENTS WERE HIP!(but no,im not gonna post their jumpshots.ew.)

my sometimes temperamental younger brother.
i like this picture,he looks like he's a ballerina;
dont tell him that,he'd hit you or threaten to run away from home.
i do not kid.

DAMN PEOPLE.DONT REMIND ME OF HOLIDAY ASSIGNMENTS.I HAVENT EVEN OPENED MY BAG YET. DDDDDD: and its already tuesday! DDDD:
to think about it, i shouldnt whine. j2's have it reaaaaaaal worse!

ps! im listening to sorry sorry and i cannot deny that choi siwon is a sexysexysexy beast.
pps! 2PM's back in korea now. yaaaay! more okcat plzxzxzxxzxz.
PPPS! okcat pwns all colonize hoodies.

the term is over.

2009-03-13T00:30:00.005+08:00

WHEN DID IT START?! Im practically in disbelief that a term has gone by (already!) and no amount of homework or piled up tutorials can convince me otherwise.Although,the holiday homework is really annoying to look at.

Within what the calendar calls a term i have; found out that sleeping in the bus is really fun especially if you knock your head on the window without realising,that my cg-mates are really the fun-est bunch of people i've met,Literature is exciting because of things like 'angel-whore' and 'SIBILANCE!',GP is a torture to sit through,getting single digits for tests is normal (but this doesnt mean its acceptable!),people in the north(at least those i know) are country bumpkins compared to the hip-east(HARHAR) andandand pasir ris's weather is freeeeeaking bi-polar.

Im just really glad for the upcoming break.i need to catch up on Family Outing real baaad. and i cant wait for port dickson. (SEAFOOD!)

PS KHAIRIAAAAAH! LOOK WHAT I FOUND IN MY BLUETOOTH FOLDER! HAHAHAHAHAHA.

ITS MATTHEW!
i just had to post this up,lol.Matthew looks genuinely afraid of us
(or maybe just me.)
khai looks happy!
Kekekeke?

when heathcliff met 1tym.

2009-03-09T23:16:00.007+08:00

Call me childish,sinister,weird but vulgarities in songs make me happy.(yeap,eminem used to make me happy.)at the time i was listening to his mad rhymes,the vulgarities made me giggle with guilt but yet i felt satisfied coz i felt all juvie and grown-up. Of course at that time,i was pre-adolescent.Still,cant say much about now.the feeling has stayed pretty much through puberty.HAHAHAHA.

Im dragging my way slowly through Chapter 3 of Wuthering Heights so that during tomorrow's tutorial i wont have to put on my 'i-know-whats-going-on-so-please-dont-ask-me-a-question' face.Which,i might say,im pretty good at considering its been 3 tutorials and Dr. S still hasnt managed to call me up. I owe this to my very forgettable name/face. thank you mediocrity!
but still,for safety im trying to make sense of heathcliff and his annoying servant Joseph.(he's my favourite character so far.PUAHAHAHAHAH)

The only thing thats getting my through each paragraph is 1TYM's albums playing on repeat.Ive been on 1tym rampage recently,thus the vulgarity-in-songs-point.Do you know how hot english vulgarities sound in korean songs?Very hot.
I miss them yg fly gentlemen.

Mr YG-sir,we want 1tym comeback plzxzxzx.

Jinhwan,Baekkyoung,DANNY!♥ & Teddy.
obvious bias to the almighty Danny Im Taebin.

tutorials and essay assignments are piling up.and im kinda behind with all this binomial distribuition shizz.Grrr.I guess something is wrong with me because although im behind the only thing im thinking about is the upcoming holidays and having really nice seafood when i get to port dickson this weekend.(DONT JUDGE! I KNOW YOU IMAGINE EATING NICE SEAFOOD IN YOUR HEAD SOMETIMES TOO T_T)
PS!do you realise that all my H2 subjects are pretty much essay-write-your-poor-hands-off subjects? Because i just did.geez.

shiny tight pants that shimmer under the stage lights.

2009-03-08T01:19:00.004+08:00

I feel ultra accomplished because me and connie are almost finished with our volcanoes report.We are efficient yo? HAHAHAHA. okay not really since the deadline is on Monday and we started only today. still,*feels accomplished*

Yesterday was kinda epic in some ways. 1) BECAUSE I FINALLY FINALLY HAVE MY OWN POSB CARD! AND THIS DESERVES A REALLY BIG MENTION ON MY BLOG! i swear,that blue card makes me grin ear to ear just by looking at it.(dont look at me all weird,its not just a card.its a sign of my liberation!) and 2) most of us from 09a302 + some lit people and some drama people and some random teachers went to go watch Sleepless town at the drama centre.The musical in itself is different from what ive watched before.Its defnitely the most vulgar (as in,'in-your-face-you-mothafucker-kind-of-vulgar') musical ive watched.I enjoyed it though coz i dont mind vulgar just as long as it had some sense behind the vulgar-ness. Some scenes were really intense [like the freaky(even-for-me) rape scene] and being a musical,the songs and choreography were notable. i loved the comedic aspects the most! i mean, shiny gay superheroes in tight pants and references to Amy Winehouse in rehab? WHO DOESNT LOVE THAT?!
Although,ill have to admit that the set and the musical numbers werent as epic as dim sum dollies and it wasnt as intense,thought-provoking and surprising like 'the pillowman'.(Pillowman although not a musical,is my favourite play EVEEEEER.) But still,i enjoyed Sleepless town anyways. & the seats were okay for $28! especially when they 'upgraded' us to a lower circle after the intermission.

ALSO we celebrated mr monkey-fied's birthday yesterday.And being unique over-the-top a302s we blindfolded the poor monyet at the mrt station and dragged him all the way to bugis junction.HAHAHAHAHAHA. then we sang him a birthday song infront of BHG(according to syafiqah,i am lifting from her blog.HAH!)

& speaking of syafiqah,im stealing pictures from her blog too.
eh,dont blame me;FACEBOOK REFUSES TO LET ME SIGN IN! DDD:

why does everybody like to pout?they should be more like me!(and whatever it is i did with my mouth for it to come out that shape.PUHAHAHHAHA!)
*credits to the forever lovable syafiqah and whoever she stole the picture from.HAHAHA*

ps!hotmail is being one of those bitches on antm again! i havent been able to see my inbox for daaaays! hurrumph.

the reason we arrange our shoes.

2009-03-04T22:24:00.005+08:00

when i woke up today i could barely move because my whole body was aching.probably the slow-after effects of yesterday's flu. so with the ongoing internal dilemma of should i go to school or not i crawled to mama's room to see what she thought i should do.(coz thats what we all do,crawl to our mama's in times of need right?) i told her there wasnt much in school today so she said 'go back to your room and sleep' i love my ma for this.puhahahahahaha.

so when i woke up again it was 12. and like a miracle,the pain was gone.so yeah,if school was in yishun i 'would' have made some effort to go back to school after that. but meh,school is on the other side of the world. going back does not apply.

I just finished helping mama arrange the shoe-rack outside the basement door.mama says we should make it nice to see coz when people drive by our basement they wont think we're horrible disorganized people.(again,she does not make sense.but i decided to help her anyways so she'll sign my parents letter.puhahahaha.) & after helping her i realised; 1) although i love my shoes to death,i dont take care of them as much as i should D: 2) i wished my feet were bigger so i could fit into my brother's red high-cuts 3) there is an unknown black-pink vans who i think doesnt belong to anybody so im gonna wash them and make them my own.HAH! 4) there's space on my side of the rack to fit 2 more shoes,so this means i can buy one this weekend? YAAAAAY!

i miss talking with the human satellite mariah low meiqi DDD:
haha,my 'i miss you's' dont seem to cease eh?

i swear,i had a really witty title in mind but i forgot.

2009-03-02T21:04:00.003+08:00

Drama camp on friday was awesome!For one,it was the first camp i ever attended that made me feel that i wasnt just a small minion of some greater power but i was an actual person with rights.(If you've been to yt and their nonsense ug-oriented-regimentation camps,you will understand why) We got to sleep in an air-conditioned room and the activities were really fun and so was the workshop! & ohmygod the j2's really wowed me with their acting skillzxzxz.(okay,a lot of the j1s pwned at acting too)especially during human cluedo!i swear i was freaking shitting myself that night but thats just to illustrate who professional and cool the acting was.and i laughed a whole mighty lot too! seriously! everybody's so spontaneous and funny!i want to be that spontaneous too! and i had a great time with the other drama people! i even managed to dig out naeem's inner biatch.HAHAHAHAHAHA.

then subsequently on sunday i woke up feeling sore from camp.i watched romantic island on supernovatube(which i love coz it loads suuuper fast) & the movie was great! light hearted and the twist at the end was refreshing! it does help that lee minki was adoraaaaable in it! I also TRIED to watch Becoming Jane again but ALAS! waiting for youku.com to load will be the death of me so then we decided to go northpoint to shop because apparently,northpoint is a very hip place.

Maths today was really interesting.our new lecturer has such a colourful personality.so animated! kinda like mr teo seng teck x infinity. i was laughing real hard.binomial distribuition?PUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. & i got all excited looking at the china scholars in school so i turned back to one sitting behind me during econs lecture and said "Hi! welcome to meridian!" (NO IDEA WHERE THAT PIECE OF SPONTANEITY(?) CAME FROM) yeap,its cool,we're homies now yo.

oh!on my way home,i suddenly had this burst of optimism whilst looking at some sunset thing on the TPE.(ehh,dont blame me.this is what literature teaches you,to relate things like sunsets and sunrise to emotions X_X) i kinda decided that im gonna try to be more -constantly- happy in school. because i kinda realise sometimes i can be an 'anti-social animal' (AHAHAHAHA) or just zone out when people are talking,which is bad.& i also decided to stop being ridiculous (whatever that may imply.khai understands?) i think its about time that ive felt comfortable with school albeit its already been a month.so yeah :D

I AM VERY EXCITED TO SEE METALMOUTH KHAIRIAH TOMORROW.

mulan pwns all.

2009-02-26T22:21:00.002+08:00

i love mulan.it's my favourite disney movie.i just love mushu and the lucky cricket and mulan's quirky grandmother and mulan's soldier friends and the retarded ancestors. it helps that mulan is asian. you know how much i embrace the orient! i like mulan as a character too,she's like the epitome of female-cross dresser!

i have to pack for drama camp now. its very troublesome coz there's pe tomorrow too. and ill have to bring along a uniform for saturday's parent orientation day. and it's not helping that my dad's all bitchy with me because he has to cancel his golf-appointment on saturday (to attend the POS.)I already told him about it like a month ago T_T my parents havent been making sense lately,but i try not to let them get to me because nobody gains from arguing with two parties who dont make sense.

There's Height & Weight tomorrow. in an ideal world,i would say that im a free-spirited hippie who doesnt give a shit about h&w because i love myself the way i am,but too bad, this is not utopia.

& i am kinda,no,very sad that i cant go to korea in june with za,nari,jojo,tall friend,jongx and nessa.DDDDD: but its okay, i will live (only with a little more sadness)
but still,i wont die.

logic vs intuition.

2009-02-25T22:15:00.002+08:00

imo,intuition totally wins.Because most of the time i find myself relying on what i 'feel' is right rather than relying on what 'is' right.like for example now,the right thing to do is to start on my 4 pages long geog tuto and print my volcanoe lecture notes (yeap,still not done from the previous blog entry) but here i am,relying on my gut feeling that blogging is the most important and 'right' thing to do now.i swear,time management only becomes 'real' AFTER you screw up.

Science fiesta was today.and zomg? its like ive forgotten EVERYTHING! methanol,ethanol,alcohol+acid =??,circuits,short-circuit,resistivity,current,yadayadayada.im ashamed to say mdm chan taught me chemistry last year.and for the bio-stations i basically just,O_O at everything. but i did draw a very cute dragon for one bio station.my dragon was purple and he has 'chicken feet'(literally)

& i feel the need to rant about GP lessons.i dont get why we need to 'copy' down her slides in this day and age where technology allows us to download and print.I dont learn 'anything' from copying.and the fact that she bores me to death in the subject i was MOST keen and excited about really makes me mad. i miss E.T!

MY COLONIZE HOODY HAS ARRIVED! YAAAAAY! but not so much yay coz MJ's LTs are not cold.they're warm.im not kidding.but still,im excited anyway!
and i know you've had enough of my 'i miss'-es but im gonna squeeze one more in anyway;
i miss korean class and my songsaengnim DDD: (and her really nice ahjumma curly hair)

ps! if i could,i'd say(to youknowwho);dont be saaad,its really okay! :D

mister kang loves me! not saebyeok!

2009-02-23T23:17:00.004+08:00

before anyone reports my blog as being dead,ahem jarratt ong, im updating!its 11:21 now and i should be better off sleeping or printing my geog volcanoes lecture notes or finding for my pe tshirt but i had a sudden urge to blog.and as the world knows, sudden urges cannot be fought off.

before i ramble on what's been happening and how tired i am,i wanna say that i really really really miss 4/7 and the retards in YT.i miss spending only $1.50 during recess everyday,i miss english lessons with mr teo,i miss fighting with the almighty weetoonhuey,i miss insulting eugene lam and the other retards,i miss sleeping in amaths,i miss zaki's lame jokes and i really cant believe im saying this but i kinda miss SPA! okay,maybe not the SPA part,but my SPA partner SYLVIAA! gah,i miss you bunch of retards! (note:WU RUOHAN,IS NOT INCLUDED IN THE 'MISSED' LIST)

SO!on friday was yuding's birthdaaaay and our impromptu surprise party for her at her void deck at 11:30 pm was a success!Aside from the fact that me and ruohan(with our BARNEY party hats) forgot where yuding's house was and ended up running around the 10th floor like idiots and we argued for 10 mins whether to get yuding a cactus or a sunflower and we had to wait 1hr for the pastamania to come,everything was goood!&&peektures!stolen from yuding's blog lol.

under the void deck at 12 am,with cold pizza,balloons and lots of yamapi.HAHAHAHA.
ps!mitch looks kuku.(because he is one!)

I did get 'grounded' for coming home at 1 though.but its okay coz it's worth it and my parents forgot all about 'grounding' coz the next day i still went out.PUHAHAHAHAHA.

& there was road race! and we run-walked? yeah.okay,normally i curse the thought of running,but run-walking is fun.khairiah hanged out with 09a302 again.HAHAHA.and the amount of (positive) eavesdropping i did that day is enough to last me a lifetime.The number of times i smiled to myself secretly was also alarmingly high.I seriously think i should stop.its not a big deal,but i just think i should stop giggling.really.me no want to be a giggly girl.(khai thinks its perfectly fine though. she thinks we shouldnt stop giggling)
and its okay if you think i dont make sense.SUB-TEXT PEOPLE! SUB-TEEEEEEXT!

THEN,i went to suntec to meet my favourite bbsg bunch for ZAJANGNIM'S SURPRISE BIRTHDAAAY.i went straight after road race,in my very very very very bright yellow atlas shirt (that ive grown to love.) I love surprise parties,i get all excited and nervous even if im just supposed to sit there and hide my face with the swensen's menu.but nonetheless,happy birthday yudingg and zaaaaa!

wuruohan thinks my blog is too wordy. but i dont care because words are for the effing win.
ps! there's draaama tomorrow. and ive lost all my acting abilities.
and ps! school is money sucking vampire that has sucked me dry of me money.
&& pps! i think connie ho's jokes are REAAAAALLY LAME.(but its okay coz she is bimbo :DD) hahaha connie!
PPPPPS! GEE IS STUCK IN MYHEAD FOR THE FRICKING INFINITY TIME TODAY.

& OH! jojo sent me new okcat peektures yesterday! his new hair is :DDDD! i love jo for sending me random okcat updates!

teehee! taecyeon~aah.

i miss my 옥고양이!

2009-02-17T23:23:00.004+08:00

my ok-cat.

i really do! mr jyp really needs to give more more more songs and promotional activities for 2pm! so i can see my okcat more often.PLEASE MR JYP-SIR! (i love your transparent plastic pants! i swear)
My ipod is rotting currently because i dont have any new songs to add! Due to the fact that both BigBang and 2pm is inactive right naow.NOT TO MENTION WONDERGIRLS or Hyori or Epik or Mong or any other people that i love.Its exasperating coz i feel the need to download something new,and the songs that are up for download are really pathetic.really!
& although im blogging,and it seems like im quite free,i am not.An hour on the computer everyday is a suuper duuper reduction from 12 hours on the computer everyday. and this means i dont have time to download my mega-huge HDTV quality files of Family Outing or Intimate Note (with bigbang) DDDDD: I cant even go pic/gif-hunting at bestiz.This makes me sad. DD: very saad.

Econs is really hopeless because i dont really get what we're supposed to do. and as much as i try to pay attention during lectures,mostly i go O.O or just nod my head in vain, thinking 'if i nod,maybe ill magically understand' T__T its also hopeless because everytime i WANT to start on the project thingum,i feel like sleeping. and since i am goddess at self discipline,when i feel like sleeping,i REALLY sleep.

oh,like now where i was JUST about to open the powerpoint again, but yaaaaawn. im going to sleep.

procastination is one persistant bitch.

BREAKOUT!

2009-02-16T22:36:00.005+08:00

just a quick one before this memory becomes less vivid.

1) BREAKOUT WAS AWESOME! AWESOME TO MAXIMUM CORE!it was funny as hell! ESPECIALLY THE VERY RAD 'JOKER' and uhm the very very sexy 'dandy' puahahahaha. the bboying was fricking raad laa!I didnt even mind that i was seated at circle 4 which is the fourth level from the stage! The moves were top-notch and i got reminded of LFO and bboy stone! mr choi minseok plz!.The popper was real good too! Although,his chest pops were not as sexy as Poppin Q's! I loved the bgirls too! SERIOUS! AND JIN HEE IS SUUPER PRETTY! ah,so pretty and so talented. the world is unfaaaaair.but the best thing was the beat-boxing.i swear it's so good its freaky! Dope seriously pwns all. No wonder he's one of the top few beat-boxers in korea! I had a good time catching up with BBSG TOO! and hahaha,our future looks very bright naow! and for the record,so in the future people will know;I AM FRIEND'S WITH ZAZA!:DD

ps syifa!/bimbo!( my blog-stalker!); SHOULD HAVE COME EARLIER WITH YOUR VERY NICE LFO SHIRT :DDD!

man i am tired. and there's 2.4 tomorrow. X__X!

PS! I LOVE KHAIRIAH FOR DEDICATING A VERY NICE PART OF HER BLOG TALKING ABOUT ME AND MY CLASS. so khai!dont worry coz you know that i know that i dont feel AS CAREFREE talking with my classmates compared to you or shubaa or ruohan or afrah or syara or ann or yuding (you get my point!) too.It's much much easier to talk when your there,i swear!
ill stop feeling loser-ish and i wont make you feel like a loser!
Kay,no promises there. KEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKE(im giggling,in case you were wondering)

hahaha,okay that was quite loser-ish. talking to each other through blog posts.
PUHAHAHAHAHAHA.

ps! OCK TAECYEON,I MISS YOUUUUU! DD:

hey all you angel-whores!

2009-02-15T01:04:00.002+08:00

angel-whore = my favourite phrase naow. blame 'women in literature.'

First thing,couple t-shirts imo are thee worst form of PDA ever.EVER! i saw like millionzxzx of them today and i cant help but stare at them.I think the worst one i saw today was this couple at suntec that wore shirts with the infinity sign '∞' and it read 'I will love you forever'
(deliberate dramatic pause)
PUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! i was eating my YAMI yoghurt and almost threw out the processed stale milk from my mouth when i saw that.SERIOUSLY PEOPLE! ENOUGH WITH THE CHEEESE ALREADY! I think is one of the silent things that proves that ultimately women are the controlling sex coz girls manage to get guys wear these shirts.But no,im not going to go on about sexual dominance coz there's already too much of that in literature lectures.

I just got home from a swensen's meal at the airport.initially,i didnt wanna go out coz 1) mama didnt let me go out with afrah etc and 2) i was watching 'Becoming Jane' aka James Mcavoy is one hot sexy irishman-heaven. but being the fillal daughter i succumbed to appa's sudden craving for ice-cream.

oh! and happy valentines/friendship day! and flowers are over-rated and THEY ARE SO NOT WORTH FOUR FUCKING DOLLARS. Food is nice though. VERY NICE. (so give food instead of flowers!) ps! I LOVE RUOHAN AND YUDING (much more yuding tho) FOR COMING TO MY HOUSE (secretly,when i was asleep) TO HAND ME A VERY NICE CARD! (only yuding's part because ruohan's part sucked.)Vday at school was hyped too! surprisingly,i felt a lot of love from people that i met only 2 weeks ago.HAHAHA.

I need a blardy 'stardate' seriously.Im not even keeping up with what im supposed to do/buy/borrow/bring everyday.

& in the spirit of vday,
친구들 사랑해요!
&& of course!
대성아,사랑해!^^

my thumb is in pain.

2009-02-12T21:22:00.004+08:00

im not kidding okay. its very painful. ALL BECAUSE of the prettier(but more stupid) sister who threw a tantrum because i wanted her to give my new phone back. she kicked me and i dodged but somehow her feet landed on the tip of my thumb and coz her legs are effing strong,there's like bloodclot or something in my thumb and its excruciatingly painful to type.

ive lost faith in american idol because stupid effing kara whats-her-face and her best buddy something-abdul and the dawg plus simon ( i like him,deal with it) didnt put JAMAR through to the top 36. SERIOUSLY?! and they let that bimbo kristin whats her face in?! and effing nick 'gentle'?!?! i think someone fed the judges drugs or something! even that annoying rathole TATTITITITITITIANA got in!sorry for being a total jacintha-bitch but SERIOUSLY?! JAMAR IS EFFING GREEEAT! and i love his face piercings! whywhywhy! DDD:

okay,so school has been surprisingly tiring. i havent been sleeping in lectures although i have a big urge to.But my lectures are surprisingly entertaining like in literature where our tutor bursts into opera mode or when our other lecturer names famous woman in greek mythology 'angel-whores' (my new favourite phrase okay) but the long breaks in between are really tiring!I DID go to e-hub on tuesday to eat gelare waffles though. coz tuesday is HALF-PRICE! it was really nice! and so was cutting break on the first day to eat mcdonalds.i am juvenile,deal with it.(okay not really.lol)09A302 is really made of a unique bunch of people. sometimes too unique i cant catch what they say. but ill learn to eventually. i hope?
I submitted my cca choices already and im sticking to what i can do instead of trying something new coz 2 years is just to short to go through all that 'newb' thing. so yeah,drama.(dont giggle.)

BREAKOUT MAN!AH BBOYS. CANT WAAAAIT! I MISS BBSG!

& tmr's vday! aka peer pressure day! (okay,kidding) and i still havent do my vday shizz so ill do it now.
&& HAPPY BIRTHDAAAAY SHUBAAAA MY MISSSED MONKEY FRIENDD! i am sorry that i didnt call you at 12am to surprise you. i fell asleeep.

AM-JAY.

2009-02-08T22:26:00.004+08:00

OKAY! so my body is aching everywhere because of the extensive moving we did the past 3 days of orientation.It ended superbly with our finale,rock O.N yesterday night! and the thing is,i dont even mind that my muscles ache everytime i move.If anybody ever doubted 'orientation high',saying it's untrue or whatever,i will gladly testify that it is 100% true.seriously. I,like khai, am very much loving mj now. and much more so my house,atlaaaas!
ALSO ALSO,There's one more thing that makes me happy to the point of (sometimes) deliriously giggling.KHAI KNOWS WHY.
PUAHAHAHAHAHAHA :D!

i kid you not when i say the house spirit in mj is crazy.it really is! *does banana cheer!rofl*
and i love atlas 1/09A302! because 1) all of us are lit freaks who love to discuss homosexuality and homophobia passionately (LIKE ME!) & 2) we're kinda small and its like we're in our own world. which explains our reason for doing out of the world things which kinda makes me shy sometimes.
but its okay! (On a slightly more slumpy note,for the first time in my life i cant think of anything to say sometimes and just keep quiet.I dont know,maybe its coz im not fully comfortable yet.or i let inferiority and paranoia get the better of me. i hope this feeling subsides soon coz i really do miss how natural things are with ruohan and shubaa and 4/7 where i can sarcastically say anything i want without holding back for fear of being judged.)

it's getting late and i need to go pack etc.go to khai's blog to read whatever happened during orientation and thats exactly what happened to me.only in my case,it was with an adorable group of classmates and much much much much more of the reason that makes us both super happy + giggly. (yeap,khai's jealoooous.)okay,im joking! (you do know how hard she hits right!)

tomorrow's first lecture is at 11:25. this means ill have about 3++ hours to snooze and watch movies in the library.PUAHAHAHAH. art students ftw.

PS! i am really missing out on big bang and boys over flowers noaw. which makes me sad.
i still love you dae!♥♥
PPS! TABLO'S REFERENCE TO OBAMA IN HIS DRUNKEN FREESTYLE RAP MAKES ME HAPPY!
PPPPS! BREAKOUT THIS WEEK BAAAAABY!